Total Drama Revenge of the Island: DarkWitch1999's Fanfiction
by DarkWitch1999
Summary: After Chris took the show worldwide, Camp Wawanakwa has been abandoned and turned into a toxic nuclear waste dump. It will provide a great place for all-new challenges and risks as nineteen new players fight to win the million dollar prize. Who will survive? Who will be sent home in a full body cast? Find out right here in the exciting fan-fiction of Dark...Witch...1999!
1. Fan Characters' Audition Tapes

**Mizuki's Audition Tape:**

Static on the screen appears briefly, then transitions to a large Asian themed studio room. Mizuki is standing in front of two cinder blocks parallel to each other while an open cardboard box is left open next to her.

Mizuki: Is the camera on, Oba-chan?

Oba-chan: I think so. Does red light mean camera is on?

Mizuki nods her head in confirmation.

Mizuki: Yes, Oba-chan.

Oba-chan: Okay, then I ready when you are.

Mizuki: Good. (clears her throat) Hello Total Drama Producers! My name is Mizuki and I really hope you will consider choosing me as a contestant for the new season of Total Drama!

Oba-chan: You don't sound confident! You sound like sniveling weakling! Put more power in voice!

Mizuki: I'm just trying not to sound too braggy, Oba-chan. I don't want to sound arrogant.

Oba-chan: There nothing wrong with confidence! You are too humble, child! You must show confidence if you want to get picked for this show! You are suppose to promote your talents and abilities if you want drama show to pick you! I'll turn off camera now; we try this again with more power!

Oba-chan turns the camera off and turns it back on a couple of minutes later.

Oba-chan: Red light is on. Camera is on.

Mizuki: (clears her throat and adds more confidence to her voice) Hello Total Drama Producers! My name is MIzuki and I would definitely be a great contestant if you choose me! (pauses for a moment) Was that better, Oba-chan?

Oba-chan: Eh, better than first try. But keep going, and remember...confidence!

Mizuki: So in case all of you are wondering, the old woman who is giving me tips is my grandmother. I'm Japanese-Canadian, so I call her Oba-chan, which means "grandmother" in Japanese. Say hi to the producers, Oba-chan.

Oba-chan turns the camera towards herself.

Oba-chan: Producers of Drama show, you would be insane not to choose my granddaughter for your t.v. show! You will see, she has many talents to offer! (Oba-chan turns the camera back towards her granddaughter).

Mizuki: (blushes bashfully) Thank you, Oba-chan.

Oba-chan: Don't look so bashful and modest. Be proud of your abilities! Tell drama producers what you can do.

Mizuki: (faces the camera with confidence) Right! To pick up where we left off, you should know that I do have quite a few skills to bring to the island. I get along with pretty much everyone and I am a team player all the way! I'm also pretty smart as well...

Oba-chan: (sighed heavily) Shin'ainaru-shin no ko yo! Anata wa amarini mo kenkyodesu! Anata no chisei wa anata no kurasumeito yori mo sugurete iru koto wa yoku shitte imasu! Anata wa ōgoe de sakebu tame ni, kōdona sūgaku no jugyō o toru!

(English Subtitles: Dear God child! You are too humble! You know darn well that your intelligence is superior to your classmates! You take advanced math classes, for crying out loud!)

Mizuki: Mā, watashi wa takai chisei o jiman suru tsumori wanai! Tokuni tōtarudorama no purode~yūsā ni, karera wa sudeni Noa to iu namae no shira rete inai nōhau o motte imasu!

(English Subtitles: Well, I'm not going to go around bragging about my high intelligence! Especially to the Total Drama producers; they've already got an obnoxious know-it-all named Noah!)

Oba-chan: Noa wa dochiradesu ka?

(English Subtitles: Which one is Noah?)

Mizuki: Shīzun 1 no dojjibōru no episōdo o oboete imasu ka? Watashitachiha issho ni sono koto o mita koto wa tashikadesu ka?

(English Subtitles: Remember the dodge ball episode from season one? I'm pretty sure we watched that one together?)

Oba-chan: (snaps her fingers) Ā sō! Dojjibōru no shiai o kobanda shōnen shōnen! Sono yōna taida wa kare ni fumeiyo o motarasu!

(English Subtitles: Ah yes! Scrawny boy who refused to play the game of dodgeball! Such laziness brings him disgrace!)

Mizuki: (giggles than faces the camera) In case you were wondering, I was speaking Japanese!

Oba-chan: And quite excellently for being raised to speak English as primary language.

Mizuki: With you as my teacher, my Japanese better be perfect or else. (chuckles lightly) I also speak several other languages such as Chinese, Korean, Spanish, French, and I've recently began learning Italian. Learning to speak Japanese, Korean, and Chinese was Oba-chan's idea, but the other languages were something I wanted to learn as a hobby. And who knows? If I win the million dollars, I might spend it on a trip to any one of those countries where I speak their language. I would also like to point out that I'm well aware that being smart isn't enough to win this show. I have seen all three seasons of Total Drama and I know that Total Drama will involve intense physical challenges that can land me in the hospital if I'm lucky. (Mizuki smirked at the camera) But let me show you all why I am not worried one bit!

Mizuki kneels down towards the box and pulls out five blocks of solid concrete stacked together and placed the on top of the two parallel cinder blocks as if she carried textbooks. Mizuki cracked her knuckles, and raised her right hand. She lowered and raised her right hand a few times as if she was determining the amount of force to put in her chop.

Mizuki: EEEYYYYAAAAAHHHHH!

Mizuki struck the blocks of concrete with her hand, causing the blocks of concrete to be perfectly sliced through. Mizuki gave the camera a smile of confidence as she placed her hands on her hips.

Oba-chan: That's my granddaughter! I would like to see the contestants do that!

Mizuki: (still showing a confident smile) You saw it right here! I chopped through five blocks of solid concrete perfectly! I've spent twelve years of my life learning martial arts from Oba-chan! She may be old, but on her side of the family, age only makes you stronger! Especially if you've been training every day for over sixty years.

Oba-chan: My family also has great endurance! Our bones put diamonds to shame with their ridiculously strong durability. Whatever you producers throw at my granddaughter, she can take it!

Mizuki: (muttering to herself quietly) Thanks Oba-chan, you just signed my death warrant. (faces camera) Oba-chan is right; my Japanese side of the family are very strong. That is why I think I would be quite a formidable contestant on Total Drama. With a combination brains, brawn, and an honorable code to boot, I can guarantee high ratings for the show. If you pick me to be on Total Drama, I ensure you that I will win with honor or lose with honor. Either way, expect a lot from me as a contestant. (smiles with confidence) Especially when you see what I can really do with my other hidden talents. If you want to know the full extent of what I can really do, you'll just have to find out by picking me. (bows) Anata no jikan o arigatō!

(English Subtitles: Thank you for your time!)

Static on the screen appears, end of audition tape...

 **Jordan's Audition Tape:**

Static on the screen appears briefly, then transitions to a greenhouse that is filled with many different varieties of plants and has several parrots flying around, inside a bird cage, and/or perched on something. Jordan stands in front of the camera with a macaw parrot perched on his shoulder. In the background, the squawking of several other birds can be heard along with the sound of birds rustling in their cages.

Jordan: Hey there, producers! My name is Jordan and I would totally rock on Total Drama! The audition sheet says that this season of Total Drama is going to take place back on the island from season 1, which is not only totally awesome for Total Drama fans like me to go to the place where it all started, but will also be a huge advantage to me as well. I'm really into plants, as you can see from my family's vast collection of plants in our greenhouse, and I'm also an expert with animals as well. I love all animals, but my favorite animal is birds, like Lucy over here.

Lucy: (squawks) Over here! (nuzzles Jordan)

Jordan: (strokes Lucy under the chin) Plants and animals have always been interesting to me. Maybe because my dad is a veterinarian and my mom is a botanist. Anyway, my knowledge of animals and plants will definitely come in handy in surviving anything the island has to throw at me. Oh! I should also mention that I'm also a gifted musician as well. Honestly, I'm not sure what my musical talents could contribute to for my team unless we are doing another musical like last season, but I thought I should bring that up. I can literally play any instrument anyone can hand me. I play guitar, bass, drums, piano, the trumpet...(the video fast forwards as Jordan continues listing off instruments. After about three minutes of the video has been fast forwarded, the video resumes at normal speed)...the accordion, the xylophone, the violin, the french horn...(the video fasts forward again. After another three minutes of the video has been fast forwarded, the video resumes at normal speed)...and I believe that's all the instruments I can play. Again, I'm not sure how that will help me in the game, but I thought pointing out my talents would make myself more appealing. So I hope you will pick me as a contestant for this season of Total Drama! Though if I do get on the show, I will totally miss my awesome girlfriend, Mizuki. And if I don't get on the show...well, I'll still miss my girlfriend since she's auditioning for this show as well. Mizuki is the most amazing girl I've ever known; obviously she'll land herself a spot on Total Drama without a doubt. Honestly, I think she has more of a chance of getting on Total Drama than I do. It would be cool if we were both able to get on the show, but (chuckles lightly) what are the chances of that?

Static on the screen appears, end of audition tape...

 **Carly's Audition Tape:**

Static on the screen appears briefly, then transitions to the bleachers, where Carly is sitting with her legs crossed while holding the camera with her right hand. From the background behind her, several football players were having football practice while she recorded her audition tape. Carly was dressed in her school's cheerleader uniform and had pom-poms in her lap.

Carly: Hi there, I'm Carly and I believe I would be a great contestant for Total Drama for several reasons. (twirls a piece of her hair) For one thing, I believe I have the athletic ability to handle any sort of intense physical challenges the show has to throw at me. I've been a cheerleader since 8th grade and I've been taking gymnastics since I was little, so physical challenges should be pretty easy with my gym and athletic skills. I'm also a team player and I like to believe I can get along with anyone or at least be able to work with anyone. I am also a solid A and B student, so in case you were thinking I was one of those stereotypical "airhead cheerleaders" whose IQ is about the size of their shoe size, I can assure you that I am not a ditsy airhead. Al-...

Carly was interrupted by the loud blaring sound of a whistle and the sound of football players yelling "touchdown!" and screaming their heads off like cheering banshees. Carly looks annoyed by this and rolls her eyes as she looks back at the camera.

Carly: (reaches towards her ear) It's stuff like this that almost makes me glad that I'm deaf. (turns off hearing aid) I suppose I should explain that I am deaf. I've been deaf for pretty much since I was born. Although I can't hear normally, my hearing aid makes up for that and allows me to hear sounds that I wouldn't have been able to hear without it. It's also beneficial for when I'm trying to tune out annoying or too loud sounds around me. I know that me being deaf would seem like it would put me at a disadvantage, but just because I can't hear doesn't mean I'm helpless. For example, I am also an expert at lip reading so I can understand what others are saying around me or towards me.

Football Player: Hey Carly, heads up!

Carly: (unaware of what the football player just said continues) So if you pick me for the next season of Total Drama, I promise that you won't regret it. This deaf girl is going to show the world just how far she can get even without the ability to hear normally! (A football starts flying closer towards Carly who remains unaware) I guarantee you I am going to rock on Total. Drama. Reveng-...

Carly is cut off by the football hitting her in the back of the head, causing her to face plant onto the camera. Static on the screen appears, end of audition tape...

 **Jason's Audition Tape:**

Static on the screen appears briefly, then transitions to a very crappy and messy looking apartment. Police sirens can be heard from the background as Jason faces the camera while sitting in a damaged bean bag chair with duct tape on several areas of the bean bag chair.

Jason: (deadpan tone) Yo, I'm Jason! And I'm just gonna be straight with you; I don't watch Total Drama whatever that much. I've really only watched the show whenever I'm hanging out a friend's house; they think the show is awesome. I've only seen several episodes of the show but they were out of order and from each season. But you don't have to be an expert on Total Drama to win Total Drama. If the cast from seasons 1 through 3 can survive their first season, than I can without a doubt survive as well. As you can see, unless your blind, I live in a crappy apartment building in a very rough neighborhood. I had to learn to survive this neighborhood before I could even walk or talk. One mistake can get you shot at by some douche bag, stabbed by a homeless guy with a broken beer bottle, raped by a registered sex offender, and/or mugged by some punk or another homeless guy. (sighs heavily) Yeah...it's really messed up over here, especially if you live in this crap shack. The landlord's a douche bag who doesn't care about his tenants or takes care of HIS apartment building, and the neighbors are annoying as hell! There are only a few decent people who live in this building; the rest of them are a bunch of crooks, drug-junkies, typical grade A (*beep*)holes, occasionally a depressed person who "vacates" after the first month or less, and families with 24/7 domestic disputes.

The muffled sound of a door slamming shut can be heard.

Jason: (sighs heavily and rolls his eyes) Speak of the devil...the jack(*beep*) that lives next to me is home late. (sarcastically) This will be fun...

(As the following conversation takes place, Jason silently mimics the man and woman as they argue)

Woman: There you are! Where have you been?! Do you have any idea what time it is?!

Man: (*beep*) you, you (*beep*)! I was out!

Woman: Out where?!

Man: NONE OF YOUR (*BEEP*)(*BEEP*) business! That's where I was!

Woman: None of my business?! It's freaking midnight, you (*beep*)! It's none of my business to know where my husband is doing out so late?!

Man: Your (*BEEP*)(*BEEP*) right it's none of your business!

Woman: I bet you were out partying with your (*BEEP*)!

Man: DO NOT CALL HER THAT!

Woman: YOU ADMIT IT! YOU (*BEEP*)ing (*BEEP*)head!

Man: Y'know what?! Yes, I admit it! I was (*Beep*)ing! And while we're at it, I've got a bone to pick with you, too! I found two hundred dollars that I didn't spend listed on our bank statement! What the hell did you buy?!

Woman: I bought some new curtains!

Man: OOOHHH! Well ain't that just fan-(*beep*)ing-tastic! It's not like we have curtains! Just those (*beep*)ing things that hang down the windows! What were they again?!

Woman: Other than ugly, they're old rags! I was trying to brighten up this (*beep*)y apartment! In fact, those curtains might just add value to this whole crapper we live in!

Man: You're always spending money we don't have on (*beep*) we don't need! Who do you think pays for everything around here?!

Woman: That would be me, you son of a (*beep*)! Your crap job doesn't even pay a quarter of our rent!

The couple continued fighting as Jason stopped mimicking them and rolled his eyes.

Jason: I have to put up with that kind of bull all the time. Y'know what's the worse part? The apartment walls are supposed to be really thick! I swear if I get on this show, I will do whatever it takes to win so I can finally move my dad and I out of this crap hole, far away from our annoying neighbors like the Figpuckers next-door! Maybe then my dad will be motivated to get his life tog-...

Jason was cut off by the sound of breaking glass. Jason sighed heavily and rolled his eyes as he stood up.

Jason: I swear, that's it! I can't listen to this anymore! (Walks out of the camera's sight and starts banging on the wall) Hey! Mr. and Mrs. Pig(*beep*)er! SHUT THE HELL UP!

Man: (*beep*) you! You little piece of (*beep*)! This ain't none of your (*beep*)(*beep*) business!

Jason: Then either fix your marriage or get a divorce already you (*beep*)ing douche bag!

Man: Why don't you go snort crack with that (*beep*)ing cracker you call a father, you son of a (*beep*)!

The room went silent for a moment. Then Jason walked back over to the camera, obviously trying his best to suppress his rage. His right eye was twitching in anger, but he maintained his usual deadpan look.

Jason: (calmly) I gotta go beat the living (*beep*) out of a certain (*beep*)hat by kicking his (*beep*)ing (*beep*). Think about picking me for the next Total Drama and I'll show you how much of a bad(*beep*) I can be!

Static on the screen appears, end of audition tape...

 **Luke's and Luna's Audition Tape:**

Static on the screen appears briefly, then transitions to a beach. Luke and Luna stand in front of the camera while also standing next to a surfboard and dressed in their swimsuits.

Luna: Yo Troy, is the camera rolling?

Troy: Camera's rolling dudes, whenever you guys are ready!

Luke: Cool! What's up, TD producers? I'm the radically awesomely intelligent fanatic of the strange, Luke Keaton!

Luna: (snickers at Luke's introduction) And I'm Luke's more athletic, more awesome, OLDER sister, Luna Keaton!

Luke: (fake coughs) By ten minutes...

Luna: (fake coughs) still older than you...

The two looked at each other and laughed.

Luke: In case you haven't figured it out yet, Luna and I are fraternal twins.

Luna: And we're totally super close! We've been doing everything together since we were born.

Luke: We're not quite exactly alike though. And I don't just mean the fact that Luna has boobs and I have kiwis.

Both twins laugh together again.

Luna: Yeah, we also have slightly different personalities as well. For example, I'm more into sports than my brother and more exciting.

Luke: (chuckling) Not gonna deny, you do make life interesting. As for me, I'm the more intelligent twin.

Luna: Don't get the wrong idea though, I'm smart! Luke's just more intellectually gifted than I am. But I'm cool with it. He can be the brains and I'll be the brawn.

Luke: That's why we make such a great team! And just a heads up to you producers, if you want just one of us, then forget it!

Luna: True that! My brother and I are doing this audition together because we want to be on Total Drama together.

Both: So basically it's both of us or none of us!

Both of them laughed together.

Both: Yeah, sometimes we do that to!

Both of them start laughing together again. Static on the screen appears, end of audition tape...


	2. Chapter One: Bigger! Badder! Brutal-er!

(This fan fiction of Total Drama contains details of extreme stunts performed by fictional teens. Do not try any of what you read here at home! Seriously, you can get really messed up.)

A camera looks out into outer space. From its view, an astronaut is shown floating near Earth. The astronaut taps a satellite beside him with his wrench; it flashes green and whirs to life, only to turn back red and fall apart into pieces. The astronaut sighs and facepalms with disappointment.

Chris: We've been to the movies. We've been around the world. And this season, we're going right back to where it all began- at Camp Wawanakwa!

The camera pans to Camp Wawanakwa's Dock of Shame where Chris McLean stood as he began to walk along the wooden dock, which squeaks under his feet.

Chris: I'm Chris McLean, and as you can see, things have changed since we've been away.

An intern shows up at a distance, holding up a platter with a coconut drink on it. As Chris stops next to the intern, the Wawanakwa sign tilts down on one end and crashes through the dock.

Chris: And by "changed", I meant gotten really, really dangerous.

Just as Chris said that, a gigantic octopus leg rises from the water and swings down on the intern, dragging him and a good chunk of the dock with it. Chris chuckles at the sight.

Chris: Good stuff. But the rules of the game remain the same!

The camera pans to the inside of the contestants' cruddy cabins from season one. A cockroach can be seen crawling on the lens of the camera as the camera moves around the cabin.

Chris: A handful of unsuspecting sixteen-year-old teens will bunk with complete strangers...

The camera pans to an outhouse door that has a pair of dirty underwear nailed to the door. The door suddenly opens to reveal the inside of the confessional from season one.

Chris: air their dirty laundry in an outhouse confessional...

The camera pans to the cliff where the contestants dived off of during the first ever Total Drama challenge. The camera zooms in on the sharp rocks below the cliff.

Chris: and compete in life-threatening challenges all over the island...

The camera pans to the bonfire area where the elimination ceremonies from season one were held.

Chris: and risk being voted off. Last one standing wins...

The camera pans to a wheelbarrow overflowing with cash.

Chris: One. Million. Dollars!

The camera zooms in closer towards the money with each Chris speaks. The camera than pans back to Chris.

Chris: Speaking of our cast, here they come now!

The camera pans to a red and white cruise ship that speedily approaches, carrying all of the cast members from season one, two, and three. The camera pans to cast members Gwen, Duncan, Leshawna, Harold, DJ, and Eva. Gwen and Duncan were making out, Harold, DJ, and Leshawna were dancing, and Eva had her arms crossed and back turned, showing her signature intimidating scowl. The camera then pans to Owen, Sierra, Cody, Izzy, and Noah. Owen was dancing while fist pumping in the air, Sierra was hugging Cody by his head while Cody smiled, Noah was looking ahead with his usual emotionless expression, and Izzy was hanging upside down from the boat railing with a life ring on her head and right arm. The camera pans to Lindsay, Tyler, Beth, and Justin. Tyler and Lindsay were making out, and Beth was admiring a shirtless Justin but quickly frowned when a bird pooped on Justin's shoulder. The camera than pans towards the remaining contestants Heather, Courtney, Bridgette, Geoff, Katie and Sadie, Trent, for some unknown reason the Drama machine from season three, and the still feral Ezekiel. Katie and Sadie were smothering Trent in a huge hug, Geoff and Bridgette danced together, Courtney scowled just as she typically does, Heather was held in the arms of the Drama machine while looking very creeped out, and the feral Ezekiel was chained to the boat railing as he hung onto it with the wind blowing the little long strands of hair that he had left and he also had his tongue out like a dog poking its head out of a window of a moving car. The camera pans back to the dock, where Chris waves at the cruise ship as it zips right past the dock.

Owen: NOOOOOooooooooo...!

Chris: (chuckles) Heheh. No, not them. this season we've got all new players fighting for the million! And here they come now- for real!

The camera pans to another cruise ship carrying the nineteen new contestants onboard. The camera then zooms in to show the new contestants more clearly.

Chris: Meet Jo!

A girl in dark sweats and a sweatshirt has her arms crossed. She looks at the red haired stocky guy in a tank top with a scowl.

Jo: Stay out of my way if you value your kiwis!

Chris: Scott!

Scott: Right back at ya.

Scott takes a sniff of his armpit as the camera pans towards a girl with intense red hair tied into pigtails and a boy with spiky brown hair, tanned skin, and very skinny arms.

Chris: Zoey! And Mike!

Zoey: (Nudges Mike's elbow) Can you believe we're here?

Mike: (smiles nervously) Y-Yeah...its...beautiful... (gazes into Zoey's eyes)

Chris: Lightning!

A male jock with shoulders like a football player and dark skin jumps in between Mike and Zoey out of nowhere, causing them both to fall backwards.

Lightning: Hello, Gorgeous! (Starts kissing his huge biceps)

The camera pans towards a black haired punk who Mike landed on when he was pushed backwards by Lightning.

Chris: Jason!

Jason: (rudely pushes Mike off of him) Get off of me, stick arms!

The camera pans towards a built teen with a crew cut and a thick unibrow, who caught Zoey in his arms after she fell.

Chris: Brick!

Brick: (drops Zoey and salutes) Brick McArthur! Reporting for duty!

The camera pans towards a big guy wearing a hoodie and jacket, who also has a calm and quiet expression on his face.

Chris: B!

Without saying anything, B just makes a quick point to the camera before the camera pans towards a girl with white-blonde hair, who was also meditating on the rail of the cruise ship.

Chris: Dawn!

Dawn: (places a hand on B's shoulder) Your aura is exceptionally purplish-green. Oh, it suits you though!

The camera pans down towards a couple who both looked very excited. The girl was a Japanese-Canadian and the boy was a muscular dude who also looked as if he was the stereotypical "chill dude".

Chris: Mizuki! And Jordan!

Mizuki: (squeals with joy) This is so exciting! We're going to be on our favorite reality show, Total Drama!

Jordan: I know, babe! (Pulls Mizuki closer towards himself) I'm so glad we're doing this together!

Mizuki: (stares deep into Jordan's eyes) Me too...

Mizuki and Jordan started to make out as the camera pans towards a red headed girl, drawing in her notebook.

Chris: Carly!

Carly: (Continues to draw in her notebook for a moment before she looks up from her notebook, towards the camera) Hm? Oh, hi there! (Waves)

The camera pans towards a pair of fraternal twins. The female twin was hanging upside down from the boat railing much like Izzy did, but without the life rings. The male twin watched his sister in amusement.

Chris: Luna and Luke!

Luna: (cheers) Wooooooooo! This is awesome!

Luke: Just be careful, dude. If you break your neck, you might as well be breaking mine!

The camera pans towards a girl with orange-tinted shades and long sunshine-yellow hair.

Chris: Dakota!

Dakota: Hey there! (Giggles and waves at the camera) Dakota here! And I'm gonna win thi-...

Dakota was cut off when the camera panned away from her and towards a girl with a possibly fake copper colored tan who was spraying hair spray onto her huge hair poof.

Chris: Anne Maria!

Anne Maria: (continues spraying her hair) Ah yes, three more coats oughta do it.

Anne Maria was then pushed away out of camera view by Dakota.

Dakota: Whoa! Who said you could pan away?!

Anne Maria sprays her hair spray at Dakota, causing her to fall to the ground.

Anne Maria: Don't push me, Blondie!

A round girl with short brown hair and a red ribbon in her girl then walked up to Anne Maria.

Chris: Staci!

Staci: My great aunt Millie invented suntans. Yeah, before her people smeared themselves with clay.

Anne Maria then proceeded to spray Staci, causing her to cough and fall to the ground. The camera pans up towards a small dark skinned boy with glasses, who was standing alone near the railing from the second level of the cruise ship.

Chris: Cameron!

Cameron: (takes a deep breath in) Fresh air! A real lake! Birds!

Right on cue, a group of birds start flying towards Cameron causing him to fall onto the lower level of the cruise ship, where a wide guy with curly hair and glasses was playing a video game on a handheld console.

Chris: And Sam!

Sam: Oh yeah! Grenade launcher upgrade! Hehe! Now we're cooking!

The camera pans back towards the dock where Chris stood.

Chris: Yup, it's our roughest, toughest, most explosive season ever!

Chris pulls out a single-button remote from his pocket and presses the red button with his thumb, with an evil grin on his face.

The camera pans to the cruise ship. KABOOOOOMMMM! The cruise ship explodes into light, becoming nonexistent in an instant. Every contestant screams as they free-fall into the water. The camera pans back to Chris.

Chris: (chuckles) Right here on...Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!

The camera zooms out a little with each of the last words Chris speaks to show a full view of Camp Wawanakwa. The scene then fades to black.

*Theme song plays*

The camera fades into Cameron screaming as he falls onto a rock and groans in pain.

Cameron: (groaning) Is this what pain taste like?!

Cameron slides of the rock and into the water as Anne Maria and Jason swim angrily towards the shore in the background.

Anne Maria: (tries to keep her head above the water) Chris is so getting the beat down for this!

Jason: Music to my ears, Hairspray! I can't wait to wring McLean's (*beep*)ing neck!

The camera pans to Zoey and Staci, who are drifting on a piece of wood until Jo swims between them, causing the wood to break and Staci to flail in the water since she couldn't swim.

Jo: Outta the way! Triathlete coming through!

Jo then pushes Sam's head underwater as she uses him as a steppingstone to launch herself.

Sam: Hey!

The camera pans to Luna and Luke. They were both sitting on a purple surfboard while using their legs to paddle forward.

Luna: (smirks) And you said to leave my surfboard with the rest of our luggage! Now we have a lifeboat! Who brought unnecessary luggage onboard the ship now?

Luke: (raises arms in defense) How was I suppose to know Chris was gonna blow up the boat?!

Mizuki and Jordan swam closer to the twins' surfboard.

Mizuki: Are you surprised he did? That sounds just like something Chris would do!

Luke and Luna looked at each other and shrugged.

Both: True. Got us there.

The camera pans to Cameron who is flailing his arms as he sinks to the bottom.

Cameron: H-Help...!

Scott swims past Cameron, not even stopping to help him or even looking concerned.

Scott: Spazz...

Cameron sinks to the bottom. After a few seconds, he is raised above the water by Lightning.

Lightning: I'll save you, little girl!

Cameron: I'm a boy!

The camera pans to Dakota, who is laying on a life raft as a small boat carrying photographs took her picture.

Dakota: (turns to the paparazzi) Hi fellas! However did you find me?

The paparazzi stops taking pictures for a moment.

Paparazzi guy: Uh, we got your text?

The paparazzi continues to take pictures of Dakota as the camera pans to Chris watching the scene unfold from a monitor.

Chris: (annoyed) For crying out loud! (Turns on the speaker from his headset) Uninvited guests, over.

The camera pans to behind the paparazzi boat where Chef is seen in his scuba diving gear as he emerges from the water and places a detonation device with Chris's face on it onto the boat. The device blinks a green light as the camera pans back to Chris, who is now holding a remote and has a sinister grin on his face as he presses the button with his thumb.

BOOOOMMMMM! The detonation device goes off and blows up the boat, along with the paparazzi who are scattered off in the sky to who knows where.

Dakota is also blasted away by the explosion and ends up landing in Lightning's hand while also pushing Cameron off, causing him to crash into Anne Maria, but didn't knock her down due to her ridiculously hard hairdo. Cameron sinks to the bottom.

Anne Maria: Aye! No touching the hair, four-eyes! (Pulls out her can of hairspray and starts spraying her hair again as she swims away)

Jason sees Cameron sink to the bottom and sighs.

Jason: (rolls his eyes as he swims towards where Cameron sunk) why can't I just let him drown? One less player for me to deal with...

Jason takes a deep breath and dives underwater. A few seconds later, he emerges back up to the surface while holding Cameron, who coughed up water as he tried to thank Jason, though his thanks was incoherent since he was uncontrollably coughing up water.

Jason: (rolls his eyes) Yeah, whatever. (Starts to swim towards the shore) Just remember; you owe me one!

The camera pans to Staci who is flapping her arms around as she tries to not sink underwater.

Staci: I wish my third uncle twice removed was here...(starts sinking down then rises back up) he invented life preservers...!

Staci sinks to the bottom. Zoey and Mike then rush from opposite directions towards Staci to save her.

Mike: Hang on!

Both: I'm coming! Oh!

They both paused as they met up with each other.

Mike: (nervously) oh, no you first. Please...

Zoey: Oh no, please go ahead. I insist!

Mike: (sheepishly) well I mean, if you insist...

Luna and Luke then drifted towards Mike and Zoey on their surfboard raft.

Luke: You guys need some help?

Mike and Zoey: No, we're good. But thanks!

Mike and Zoey looked at each other with a smile and laughed together. Their moment was cut short however when Staci's popped up between them and pulled Mike underwater.

Zoey: (gasps in fear) Hold on!

Zoey dives underwater after the two. After a few seconds, all three of them surface while gasping for air and spitting out water. Mike was hanging onto Staci while Zoey was hanging onto Mike.

Mike: (looking at Zoey) Thanks, I owe you one!

Confessional

Mike rolls the toilet paper in the toilet paper holder before speaking.

Mike: Okay, my first confessional! So...uh...Zoey...nice girl... (pauses for a moment and smiles) okay, super nice! (Looks down) I wonder if she'll go out with a guy like me. (Shifts eyes to the left) See, I have this...um...quirk? I just hope my condition doesn't ruin everything for me again. (Sighs heavily).

Zoey: Wow! I can't believe I'm actually in the Total Drama confessional! It's so exciting! Everyone seems so nice! (Worries) I hope they all like me. I could use a few new friends, or friends period. (Grows more worried) Oh, what if they hate me? Maybe this flower was too big? Am I trying too hard? You like me right?

Staci: This is so amazing! I'm actually here on Total Drama! Did you know that my great great great great great grandmother invented drama? Yeah, before her people's lives weren't very interesting to watch or read about. Anyway I'm definitely going to win Total Drama Revenge of the Island because I come from a long line of people who think outside the box. Like my great grandfather Dave who invented forks! Yeah, before him, people just shoved food in their mouths with strips of bark, yeah. And my great great aunt Lois invented plates! Before her, food just sat around the floor getting stepped on, so sad. And my great great great uncle George, he invented floors. Before him, the only way you could have a carpet is if you let grass grow inside your house. (The low battery warning appears on the camera) Once I tell everyone here about my family, I know they'll be impressed and want to form an alliance with me! Those who form alliances tend to get farther in the game most of the time. And I should know since alliances were invented by my great great great great great...

Staci was cut off when the camera turned off due to the dead battery.

The camera pans to the beach shore where Jo arrives panting and looking around to see if anyone else was there.

Jo: (cheering) Whoo hoo! That's what I'm talking about! First one on the...

Jo suddenly frowns in shock as she notices that she was not alone. The camera pans to show that Dawn was in fact the first one on the beach. Dawn was sitting on a rock, meditating while holding a starfish up high.

Jo: (shocked) How did you-...you're not even wet!

Dawn stops meditating and looks at Jo.

Dawn: Hm? Oh, I used a shortcut.

As the camera pans back to Jo, Brick crawls onto the shore beside her.

Brick: (salutes) Ma'am...(falls face first into the sand)

Confessional

Brick: I may be the strongest player here, but I'm all about the teamwork! Back in cadets, I took the teamwork medal three years running! Also the bed making medal, the "flag folding" medal, and the letters home to Mom medal. I always win that one.

The camera pans back to the beach shore where several other contestants have arrived on shore. Jason arrived while carrying Cameron and immediately dropped him onto the sand as soon as he stepped foot on land. Cameron groaned as he continued to cough up water. Then B emerged from underwater as he walked onto the beach without saying a single word or sound. Following B, Jordan and Mizuki arrived on the shore.

Confessional

Cameron: (rubs hand sanitizer on his hands) I am what's known as a "bubble boy". Growing up, my mom was reaaallllllyyyyyyy overprotective! So I've never gone swimming before, up until six hours ago. I've never done anything before, except read and sigh a lot...(sighs heavily, then looks back at the camera with confidence) But that doesn't mean I'm not a force to be reckoned with! (A butterfly flies into the confessional) No way! Danaus plexippus! The monarch butterfly! (Butterfly lands on Cameron's head, causing him to wince in pain as he struggled to support the added weight) Ah! I-It's so heavy! (Cameron falls backwards)

Jason: (looks at the butterfly that is still flying around the confessional, then he sighs while rolling his eyes) Kid was overpowered by a butterfly?! That's just sad...(slowly shakes his head in disapproval) I give it an hour before four-eyes is either eaten by the island's wildlife or flow out of here in an air ambulance. Oh, and just so we're clear on one thing: I'm not some big softie or anything! I didn't let the kid drown because I pity the weak! But if I have to choose between saving him or the million dollars later, I'm definitely going for the million! And Cameron can drown in a puddle for all I care! In my neighborhood, being weak will get you killed! Cameron wouldn't last a full minute back home! Which is why I plan to play this season solo! No alliances, no carrying my teammates! If my team can't keep up, they're on their own! I need to win this more than anyone else on this island! I won't make any enemies and I definitely won't be making any friends! Oh and Chris, I want to thank you personally for blowing up the boat and making me swim to shore with a little gift...(raises middle finger) (*beep*) you, McLean! (Punches the camera, causing the lens to crack)

Mizuki: (looks at the cracked camera lens) Oh C'mon, who broke the camera lens?! (Sighs heavily) Not how I wanted to start my first confessional, but what can you do? Reality TV, huh? Anyway...(clears throat) ITS SO FREAKING AWESOME TO BE HERE! I'm actually in the Total Drama confessional from Season one! I'm at the birthplace of my all time favorite reality show! This is going to be soooooo COOL! (Pauses for a moment to compose herself) Sorry, I just had to let my excitement out. I'm a huge fan of Total Drama! Well, not the stalker crazy huge fan like the girl from last season, but still a fan! Don't get used to my outburst of excitement. I'm actually pretty calm and patient most of the time. It's one of the many virtues that I have learned while learning martial arts from my grandmother. Speaking of which, (waves at camera) Oba-chan! Mama! Papa! Akiko! Shin'ichi! Kenji! I'll be thinking about all you guys while I win! Make sure you guys watch me! Love you all!

Jordan: What the heck happened to the camera lens? (Shrugs) Oh well. Anyway, I'm so glad to be on this show with my girl, Mizuki! I just hope I don't get sent home too early, that would seriously suck. As for Mizuki, I'm not too worried about her. She's got the three B's that make her totally awesome: Beauty, Brains, and a heck of a lot of Brawn! I want to tell her that she's my beautiful cherry blossom tree, but she's not a fan of Asian themed nicknames. (Shows a look of true terror) Especially the name Chopsticks! If you value your life, do not call her Chopsticks! Her martial arts teacher was her grandmother! Trust me, you do not want to make her angry for the love of god! (Takes a deep breath in and out to calm himself down) Sorry, Mizuki's just terrifying when she gets angry enough. I love her like crazy, but even I won't deny that she can be just as terrifying as her grandmother. Don't let sweet old granny fool you, I've met her! That old lady is horrifying when she's angry!

The rest of the contestants minus two, has arrived on the beach. As everyone was sitting or standing around the beach as they dried off, they listened to the nonstop chatter from Staci. Staci sat on a rock next to Mike and Zoey as she rambled on about her family.

Staci: Yeah, and my great great great uncle Bart invented swimming. Before him (flails her arms around) people just swung their arms around like this and sank to the bottom. And my great great great great great-...

Mike: (staring at Zoey while obviously not listening) Yeah, that's great...

Suddenly, the camera pans to the shore where Sam slides out of the water holding his game console high and coughing up a fish.

Confessional

Sam: (chuckles and pulls out his GameGuy) hehe...I knew I should've played that Swii Fitness workout game. (Chuckles) I just hope I don't get cut first, that would lame. But if I stick it out long enough to get cut sixth or even seventh, how cool would that be, huh? (Chuckles as he continues to play his game).

The camera pans to Zoey, Mike, Dawn, Jordan, and Mizuki.

Zoey: I'm sooo stoked to be here. I've been watching Total Drama forever! Who knows? Maybe I'll make some new friends.

Dawn: Yes, that would be good. Considering that you were an only child and all.

Zoey and Mike looked freaked out at Dawn's comment about Zoey's past.

Zoey: (shocked) Huh? Who told you that?

Dawn leans in closer to Zoey.

Dawn: Your soul reads like an open book! You had such a lonely childhood. (Holds Zoey's hand with both hands) it must have been difficult.

Zoey pulls her hand away. Dawn then looks at Mike, who looks at her nervously. In less than three seconds, Mike bolted towards the area Luke and Luna were sitting at before Dawn could say anything about him.

Mizuki: (giggling) I guess Mike's not a fan of soul reading.

Dawn: Most people aren't. I suppose it is only natural for others to become uncomfortable around me since I can learn a lot about them through their auras. I can learn about their past, their personality, their emotions, their relationships, and many other aspects of that person that makes them who they are.

Mizuki, Zoey, and Jordan just blinked, too amazed to say anything. The camera pans to Cameron, who was looking around the beach, counting the people who were on the beach.

Cameron: Hey, weren't there nineteen of us on that boat? There's only eighteen of us here.

Everyone looked around the beach and saw that Cameron was right; someone was missing.

Anne Maria: I think the pasty red haired girl with the notebook is the one we're missing.

Brink: I recommend we send out a search party!

Staci: (claps) Yeah, that's a great idea! It will be just like the first search party that was organized by my great great great great great-...

Staci was cut off by the sound of something emerging from the water. Everyone turned their attention towards the water as what appeared to be a human sized seaweed creature that was also muttering incoherent words. Everyone screamed in panic at the site of the creature. Suddenly, the creature started to cough repeatedly until it coughed up some water. Afterwards, the creature vigorously shook its body, launching all of the seaweed off of its body and revealing the creature to actually be the red haired missing competitor.

Carly: (clears throat and holds up a pink bedazzled hearing aid) I found it! Finally!

Confessional

Carly: (wrings her wet hair) Last to arrive on the island, not how I wanted to make a first impression. (Puts her hearing aid back into her ear and turns it on) But when the boat blew up, my hearing aid fell out of my ear and I couldn't just leave it underwater. Those things are expensive, especially the waterproof hearing aids! When I first signed up for this show, my family and friends were worried since Total Drama is dangerous enough as it is without having someone like me who can't hear without a hearing aid. But I'm not gonna let that get in my way! I'm going to show the world that a disability can never stop you from achieving your goals and succeeding! You can count on me winning Total Drama!

The camera pans back to the beach. Just then, Chris's voice booms out of a loudspeaker tied to a nearby tree.

Chris: ATTENTION, FRESH MEAT! SEE THE TRAIL LEADING INTO THE FOREST?

The camera pans to the trail that. Chris had mentioned. The competitors turned their attention towards the trail as the camera pans.

Chris: RACE TO THE END OF THE TRAIL, AND DO NOT DISTURB THE WILDLIFE! THAT WOULD BE BAD!

Lightning: (snickers and nudges Sam) Yeah. We wouldn't want to upset the bunnies!

Chris: THE TINIEST SOUND CAN SET THEM OFF. LIKE, THIS!

A loud airhorn blares through the loudspeaker, making the competitors clap their hands over their ears. Creature roars rise up from the distant forest, and trees start to topple. The campers start screaming in terror and running toward the path for their lives.

Confessional

Mike: (eyes widened with fear) What...

Jo: the heck...

Zoey: (terrified) was...

Jason: that (*beep*)ing...

Luke: (eyes widened) THING!

Staci: (shivers in fear) Oh my god! That was so terrifying! What kind of animal could've made that sound?! Oh I really wish my first cousin once removed was here! He once took down a ten foot tall bear! And also my great great great great uncle Travis! He invented hunting! Before him, people had to either garden or fish if they wanted to eat. (Finches as she hears the roar of the creature again. She then runs out of the confessional, screaming.

The camera pans to the finish line as Jo and Lightning arrive, with Jo being the first one to have arrived.

Jo: (cheers) Yes! Sorry you had to lose to a girl.

Lightning: (looks around confused) What girl? Lightning didn't lose, bro! Lightning never loses!

Lightning walks two steps ahead of Jo as Chris pulls over his red ATV several inches away from Lightning.

Chris: Captain Modesty, two steps left; you're on Team A! Yo, Jo! Move right, you're Team B!

Jo crosses her arms and frowns as she moves over to the right. Scott then arrived at the finish line.

Chris: Pitt-sniffer, you're Team A!

Brick arrives not much later, panting from exhaustion.

Chris: (salutes) Corporal Brickhouse! Team B!

Brick: (still panting but salutes) Sir! Yes sir!

Brick is then knocked down to the ground as B bumps into him as he skids to a halt.

Chris: Silent Treatment, Team A!

B silently points out his index finger as he turns around, showing Cameron hanging from the back, clinging onto B's hoodie.

Chris: Bubble Boy, Team B!

Cameron: (releases B's hoodie from his grip and runs towards Team B) Okie Dokie!

Carly skids to a halt at the finish line, slightly panting.

Chris: Hear No-Thing! You're on Team A!

Carly scowls at Chris's "nickname" as she walks towards Team A. Mizuki immediately arrives at the finish line afterwards.

Mizuki: (catching her breath) I-I...I think I finally got away...

Scott: From that thing in the forest?

Mizuki: (darts her eyes to the left) Yeah, that's it...from the thing...

Confessional

Mizuki: Honestly, I wasn't really worried about the creature. Oba-chan didn't train no weakling the martial arts! The thing I was trying to get away from was that chatty girl, Staci! (Claps hands onto her head) I was going to lose my mind if I had to listen to her talk about how her great great great whatever invented this and that for any longer! I don't like to say mean things about people behind their backs, but Jordan's parrots squawk less than she does! And believe me, Jordan's got a lot of parrots! I hope I don't have her on my team, I will seriously throw myself off the dock if we end up on the same team! (Sighs heavily) I'm just glad I was able to get away from her by pawning her off on Jordan. Though I do feel guilty about leaving him alone with her. I hope he's doing okay.

Jordan: (smiles big at the camera while his right eye twitches rapidly. His hair was frazzled and his eyes were wide) W-Why...M-...Mizuki?! (Starts laughing crazily)

Staci: Jordan has been super nice to me! He seems to be very interested in my family since he listens to me so well! The whole time we were talking, he smiled, nodded, and didn't interrupt me once! Most people find me a bit annoying because they say I talk too much. But I think it's better to talk more than less, at least that's what my great great great great great-...

Chris: Glad you could join us, Chopsticks! You're Team B!

Mizuki's left eye twitches rapidly at the nickname "Chopsticks".

Chris: Got something in your eye, bra?

Mizuki: (through her teeth) Yes, that's it...

Mizuki walks towards Team B, while still suppressing her hidden anger towards Chris. At that moment, Luke and Luna arrived with Luna crossing the finish line first and Luke crossing the finish line second. Luke was panting but Luna didn't seem to have broken a sweat.

Chris: Surfer Twins! Congrats, you're still alive!

Luke: (panting) B-Barely...

Luna: Aw, c'mon Luke! It was only an intense run for our lives! It was actually kinda thrilling! Like being in a horror movie!

Confessional

Luke: Luna and I may be twins, but we're very different! And I not just talking about our genders. While I am the more cautious and observant one, Luna is the thrill seeker! She loves anything exciting, extreme, and last but not least, dangerous! That's why I'm glad she'll be on my team this season! I'll be the brains, she'll be the brawn, and together we'll make it to the finale and win that million dollars together!

Luna: Luke may not enjoy the exciting thrills in life as much as I do, but with his strategic thinking and high intelligence combined with my athletic abilities and fearlessness, we'll be winning the million for sure! And as always, we'll do it as a team!

Chris: Luke, you're on Team A! Luna, you're on Team B!

Luna and Luke: (eyes widened in shock) WHAT?!

Confessional

Luke: (cradling his head) T-This...isn't happening! It can't be happening! Luna and I have always been together! If we were any closer, we'd be Siamese twins! I-I...can't d-do...this without her! (Slaps self across his face) Okay! Luke, you can do this! You can't lose focus! I'll just have to stick it out long enough to make it to the merge, then Luna and I can be a team again! (Takes a deep breath) Besides, it's not like we're on separate islands, we're just on separate teams. If Luna can stay strong, then so can you!

Luna: (cries) NNNOOOOOOOOOOOO! WWWHHHHHYYYYYYY?! We might as well be on separate islands!

Luke: C'mon Chris, you can't do this to us! Luna and I have always been together! We can't be separated, otherwise we'll die!

Chris: Aw, that's adorable! I really don't care, but still adorable!

Confessional

Luke: Okay, the part about us "dying" might've been a bit of an overreaction, but still, I don't know if Luna and I can survive without each other to watch our backs. We've been on the same team for everything for years! Honestly I think the longest time we've ever spent apart was the ten minutes before I was born.

Luna: (scowls) This is so not cool!

Chris: Sorry, but arriving together doesn't mean you'll be on the same team together. Luke, you're on Team A! Luna, you're on Team B! Final decision! End of discussion! Either deal with it or ride back home on your surfboard raft!

The twins sigh heavily as they both begin to walk gloomily over to their teams. Not much later, both Zoey and Mike arrive at the finish line, both completely out of breath.

Chris: Zoey the Lonely, Team B!

Zoey: (walks over Chris while nervously rubbing her arm) Only as a child...seriously!

Chris nods his head sarcastically at Zoey as she walks over to her team. The camera pans back to Mike, who continues regaining his breath as Dawn levitates next to him.

Chris: The aura whisperer, Team A!

Mike notices Dawn standing beside him and jumps back in surprise, clinging onto B's shoulder.

Chris: Saved by a girl, Team B!

Mike scowls at Chris's nickname and runs over to his team. Dakota is the next to arrive with Anne Maria following her.

Chris: Princess Wannabe, Team A! Tan in a Can, Team B!

Dakota and Anne Maria walk over to their teams as Jordan arrives at the finish line next, panting heavily and looking frazzled.

Lightning: Yeesh, what happened to you, bro?

Jordan: (still panting) S-Staci...s-she just wouldn't stop talking! K...Kept talking about her relatives! Did you know her great great uncle Jason invented the letter E? B-Before him...everybody just had to use A's instead! (Chuckles unnervingly then stops) Why Mizuki?! Why did you leave me with her?!

Mizuki: (nervously) I'm so sorry, Jordan. I just couldn't take her squawking anymore!

Chris: Getting back to me now! Jordan, go stand next to Team A!

Jordan walks over to Team A and then gasps as he sees Mizuki on the other team, looking equally disappointed.

Confessional

Jordan: (hands clamped onto his head) I listened to Staci go on and on about her made up relatives for this! (Sighs) This completely sucks! I have to compete against my own girlfriend! And I think we all know how opposite team relationships turn out on Total Drama! I watched season two; a relationship between a certain goth girl and a number nine crazed musician went straight to Splitsville as soon as they were forced onto different teams! I think we all know who I'm talking about.

Mizuki: (Sighs heavily) I knew there was a possibility that Jordan and I wouldn't be on the same team. That's the sucky part of going on Total Drama with your boyfriend. But I know that we'll be alright!Jordan and I have been together for two years! We're not going to let the competition get between us like it did with Trent and Gwen in season two! Our relationship will survive!

Anne Maria: I give it about three episodes before they start tearing each other apart!

Jo: Having Mizuki on my team and Jordan on the other team can be a problem. Did you see them on the boat? They were acting all lovey dovey with each other the whole way to the island when they were not talking about how excited they were! Obviously Mizuki will let her feelings for Jordan get in the way of the game, just like every couple on that has ever been on this show! And we'll also have to deal with Luna's separation anxiety as well! (Sighs heavily) This won't be easy, but I'll need to make sure Mizuki understands her place! Otherwise if she messes us up during a challenge, we'll have an excuse to vote her out. As for Luna, she's just gotta learn to deal with it! If not, then we can just vote her off as well. Question is, who would go first?

A few moments later, Jason arrives at the finish line.

Chris: (scowls) Foul-Mouthed Finger Flipper, Team B!

Jason raises two middle fingers at Chris and walks over to his team, while receiving angry glares from Chris. The next one to arrive is Sam, who is crawling slowly towards the finish line while trying to catch his breath.

Chris: Yo, Game Junkie! Team A!

Sam collapses as he crosses the finish line. Finally, Staci arrives last, still chattering it up as usual, but looked exhausted nevertheless.

Staci: (breathing heavily) My uncle Bill...(gasps for air)...won the New York marathon four times...(gasps for air)...because marathons were...(gasps for air)...first proposed by my great...(gasps for air)...great...(collapses on top of Sam)

Scott: (smirks) That's one way to get her to shut up.

Jordan: (whispers) I just hope she's not on our team...

Chris: And Chatty Staci, Team A!

Confessional

Jordan: (screaming) NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Staci: It's too bad I couldn't keep up with Jordan. I had so much fun talking to him about my relatives! And I just know that he was very impressed since he kept listening to me! But now we're on the same team, so I get to talk to him all the time now! I bet he's just as excited to be on the same team with me as I am!

Jordan: (bangs head against the wall repeatedly) Why Chris?! WHY?!

The camera pans back to Chris as Scott runs up to him.

Scott: What the heck was that thing in the forest?!

Cameron: (nervously) I'm pretty sure that cry does not belong to any known animal species!

Jordan: I can confirm that as well! Take it from someone whose an expert on animals; that cry was not normal!

Chris: Relax, it'll all make sense eventually...(starts to laugh maniacally)

The camera pans to the nervous contestants as they watch Chris laugh maniacally. The camera pans back to Chris, who is wiping away a tear of laughter away from his eye with his finger.

Confessional

Cameron: (terrified) Maybe coming here wasn't such a good idea after all...(gulps)

Jason: Screw you, McLean! Bring on whatever sinisterly evils your (*beep*)ing twisted mind has come up with! You'll never break me! I can take whatever you throw at me!

Luke: On one hand, I'm very curious to know what has in stored for us. On the other hand, I'm also very scared and fear for my life!

The camera pans back to Chris.

Chris: Now, this season of Total Drama will be a little bit different. For example, in every episode, someone will be eliminated!

Everyone gasps in shock at Chris's explanation.

Zoey: It's never been that hard before!

Mizuki: (rolls her eyes) Typical. New cast, new rules to make this game even harder for us.

Chris: I know, I'm good! But since you're all first-timers, I'm going to cut you a break and hide this bad boy somewhere in the campground. (Holds up a wooden statue of Chris's head)

The camera pans to the wooden Chris statue where heavenly music plays in the background as four chefs in angel costumes come out from all four corners of the screen and fly closer towards the statue.

Chris: A genuine McLean brand Chris head! Your free ticket back into the game, even if your teammates vote you off. Whoever finds it will become THE most powerful player in Total Drama history!

The camera pans back to Chris. He squints his eyes at the wooden statue in his hand.

Chris: Is the cleft on my chin really that big?

Scott: (smirks) Yup. And it looks like a butt.

The rest of the contestants snicker at Scott's remark, while Chris scowls at Scott.

Confessional

Jo: Okay, the statue of McLean's head is very creepy looking, but I'm still gonna find it!

Lightning: Ain't nobody gonna find that statue but the Lightning! (Flexes muscles) Sha-Bam!

Sam: Cool! An extra life to keep the game going for the person that finds it! It would be so awesome if I found it! That statue would definitely be a major power-up for me! (Chuckles)

The camera back pans to Chris as he is putting away the statue, while still scowling at Scott.

Chris: Moving on! Time for the team names!

The camera pans to Lightning, Scott, and B.

Lightning: Team Lightning! (throws his arms up and points at the sky) No wait, Lightning SQUAD!

Chris: Great suggestions, Lightning. But, names have already been chosen by moi. Team A, you shall henceforth be known as...the Toxic Rats!

The camera pans to a logo of a green, four armed, fierce looking rat, then pans to Team A, who now has the team logo above their heads. Not many of the team members were thrilled about their team name. The only person on the team who seemed satisfied with the name was Sam.

Sam: (chuckles) Hehehe...Killer!

Carly: (shrugs) Eh, could've been worse...at least it's not anything like that one team name from last season.

Chris: Yeah, Team Victory was a bit of a dud. Nice name, but it didn't really suit the team that well.

Confessional

Carly: I was talking about Team Chris is Really Really Really Really Hot. But I wasn't going to insult the guy who could make my stay here even more of a living nightmare than it already would be.

Chris: Anywho, Team B, you are hereby dubbed, the Mutant Maggots!

The camera pans to a logo of a red fierce looking mutated maggot, then pans to Team B, who also had the team logo above their heads. Everyone on the team looked a bit confused about their team name.

Mike: Uh, what's with all the references to chemical waste?

Cameron: Yeah, I've been wondering the same th-...

Cameron was cut off by the sound of the terrible loud roar that everyone heard earlier. The roar made everyone jump and flinch in fear.

Cameron: (lowers his head and claps his hands on top of his head in terror) It's the monster!

The camera pans to the forest where trees come tumbling down as the roads get louder and closer. The contestants watched in horror and suspense as the creature appeared to be coming closer and closer towards them. Then finally, a hairless yellow eyed squirrel appeared out of the bushes. Everyone was confused by this revelation.

Jo: Hey, it's just a stupid squirrel!

Dakota: Awwwwwwww!

Jason: (facepalms) Your telling me that all this time we have been running for our lives from a (*beep*)ing squirrel?!

Brick: Little Guy looks a little off...

Jordan: (squints) yeah...this squirrel does look different.

The camera pans back to the squirrel, who the blinks vertically instead of horizontally. Dakota lets out a scream.

Dawn: (gasps) Oh my gosh! What's wrong with it?

Chris: While we were gone, I rented the island out to a nice family oriented bio-hazardous waste disposal company. (The camera pans to several barrels of toxic waste) Sweet people! (The camera pans back to Chris) But the waste is having a teensy bit of an impact on the flora and fauna.

Right on cue, a butterfly flies next to the hairless squirrel and the squirrel then proceeds to stick out its long frog-like tongue to grab the butterfly and eat it, while continuing to blink vertically.

Sam: (chuckles) Hehehe...cool!

Luke: Yeah, that little dude does look pretty cool!

Dakota walks over to the mutant squirrel and kneels down next to it.

Dakota: Weird...I want one! (Holds out her hand)

The mutant squirrel roars a very loud and powerful roar at Dakota. It then fires lasers from its eyes at Dakota's feet, causing her to jump up and run away screaming. The squirrel blows a raspberry at Dakota and scurries off. The camera pans to Dakota, who is now in the arms of Sam. Chris's laughter can be heard from the background before the camera pans to him.

Chris: Most. Danger. EEVVVEERRR!

Confessional

Dakota: (cries into her hands) Chris the meanest ever! (Continues crying into her hands but then stops) Hang on. (Pulls out a compact makeup mirror) Not too blotchy? Okay, take two! (Puts away the mirror and clears her throat. Then proceeds to cry again)

Dawn: That poor little soul! How could Chris allow something so cruel to happen to Mother Earth's blessings?! This is probably one of the most evil deeds Chris has done!

(Chris over loudspeaker): Not even close, Dawn! Trust me. (Chuckles)

Dawn: (rolls her eyes and scowls) What an evil man Chris is!

(Chris over loudspeaker): Awww, thanks Dawn! (Chuckles)

Luke: (eyes wide) That squirrel shoots lasers from its eyes?! While studying the island's mutated flora and fauna would be totally awesome, I am also a little scared to see how the toxic waste has affected the other animals if it can do that to a squirrel!

Jordan: (arms crossed and frowns) What Chris has done to the island is completely immoral and reprehensible! And though I am appalled by the environmental disaster that Chris has created, I am looking forward to observing the island's wildlife and plant life as well. The effects of the waste has given the wildlife on the island fascinating abilities, and watching how these mutated creatures' behavior and survival skills in this toxic waste habitat would make an interesting read for environment protection activists like myself! Maybe I can get an article about this island published in a magazine? That outta spread the word on why we should protect our environment!

Luna: (wide eyed) I am on an island that is populated by mutants?! (Pumps fist into the air and cheers) Yes! This is so awesome!

The camera pans back to Chris.

Chris: Now, before we start our very first challenge of the season, let's give out some rewards. Jo, because you made it up here before anyone else, your team gets a trampoline!

The camera pans to a trampoline and then pans up to Chef jumping on the trampoline while holding a hacksaw.

Chris: And the Rats get a hacksaw!

Chef falls off of the trampoline as he bounces up. Lightning laughs at Chef until Chef throws the hacksaw at Lightning's head. Jo laughs at Lightning's pain until Chef throws the trampoline at her from the back, causing her to fall forward in pain. The camera pans back to Chris.

Chris: What do these items have to do with this bomb? (Pulls out the same kind of bomb he used to blow up the paparazzi boat)

Mike: (nervously) Ummm...he won't really blow us up again, will he?

Chris pops up between Zoey and Mike, still holding the bomb and grinning mischievously, making Mike and Zoey even more nervous.

Chris: (smug grin) Won't I? Find out when we come back!

The scene fades to black...


	3. Bigger! Badder! Brutal-er! Part 2

The scene fades into an area of the forest where the teams stand under two large totem poles hung by rope to opposite trees. Each of the totems bore a striking resemblance to each team's logo, with the Mutant Maggots' totem resembling a three eyed mutated maggot, and the Toxic Rats' totem resembling a fierce looking mutated rat. The camera pans down to Chris and the two teams as Chris begins explaining the challenge.

Chris: Those are your team totems. Cut them down (camera pans to river) and get 'em to the river and ride 'em back to the campground. First team there gets their pick of the cabins. (camera pans back to Chris) But hurry! The totems are rigged with bombs that'll explode if you don't plant them in front of your cabin in seven minutes or less. (The camera pans to the Rats' totem pole, then zooms in closer to show the timer on the totem pole strapped to a bomb). Starting...now! (The timer starts to count down).

The camera pans to Team Maggot, who watch as Jo stands on top of a rock, ready to jump onto the trampoline.

Jo: Alright let's do this! (Jumps off the rock and bounces onto the trampoline) YEAH!

Unfortunately, Jo ends up flying into the river instead of up the totem. Mizuki and Jason facepalmed at Jo's failure.

Both: We're so screwed...

Confessional

Mizuki: Okay, maybe that was a little harsh. At least we were doing better than the Rats...

The camera pans to the Toxic Rats.

Lightning: Stand back! Lightning is ON IT! (Begins to climb up the tree, only to slide back down) Dang! Slippery tree! (stands back up) Don't worry, Lightning never quits!

As Lightning begins to climb up the tree again, B walks by looking as if he was thinking up a plan.

Staci: (turns to Dakota, Carly, and Jordan) It's too bad that my third cousin Jack isn't here to give us tips on barehanded tree climbing.

Jordan: (smiling nervously and twitching) Yeah...that's a shame. He sounds like...a REAL expert about this sort of thing. Please, tell us more...(chuckles nervously)

Everyone on the team, minus Staci, Carly, Lightning, and B, stared daggers at Jordan.

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Staci: Jordan has been such a great guy to me since we first started talking to each other in the forest! I think he is the first guy I've ever talked to for this long without him coming up with some totally bogus excuse to leave! I think we're becoming such great friends! Maybe I'll ask him later to form an alliance with me? I bet he would totally love that!

Jordan: (bangs head repeatedly against wall) WHY...DID...I...SAY...THAT?! (stops banging his head and sighs heavily) As annoying as Staci is, I can't just tell her to leave me alone! I'm too nice a guy to do that sort of stuff. Mizuki's the more assertive one in our relationship. (Sighs again) Besides, Staci looks so happy when I listen to her. I can tell that she probably doesn't have a lot of friends. I don't want to make her sad. (Bangs head one more time against the wall) Ow...why do I have to be so considerate of other people's feelings?

Carly: (points to her hearing aid) There are moments like this that make me glad that I can just turn down the volume on my ears and all I have to listen to is complete silence. (looks at camera and shrugs) What? It's not rude if I'm just listening to her through lip reading instead of hearing her talk nonstop. (Sighs heavily) I would really like to be able to work well with everyone on my team. Most of the time I am able to, but I barely know these people and some of them seems like they will be a little bit more challenging to work with then others. However, maybe if I can find some common ground with the rest of my team members, I might somehow be able to unite our team together into a team that gets along well, looks out for its teammates, and stands strong together because of our excellent teamwork! I was able to do it with my cheerleading squad back home, and I'm going to do it again here!

Dawn: I sense great tension and negative energies amongst my fellow teammates. Most of which is directed towards Staci. Everyone is getting fed up with her tales of fabricated relatives, even I find myself to be losing patience with her. Not to mention that Jordan is nearly at his breaking point with all of her nonstop tall tales. I do not hold anything against Staci, but I predict that if she does not cease her compulsive lying, disasters will fall upon her.

The camera pans to Team Maggots, where Cameron is observing the trampoline carefully to come up with a plan.

Cameron: Okay if Jo hits the center of the trampoline with fifty pounds of pressure per square inch-...

Cameron is interrupted during his explanation when Anne Maria pushes him out of her way.

Anne Maria: Back off. I wanna crack at this!

Cameron: (stands up and adjusts his glasses) But I calculated for Jo's weight!

Ignoring Cameron, Anne Maria climbs onto a large rock and jumps on the trampoline, only to smash into the bottom of the totem, causing her teammates to cringe at the sight of her pain. Unfortunately for Anne Maria, she ended up bouncing back up and down on the trampoline while continuing to smash into the bottom of the totem pole. After several smashes, Jo kicks the trampoline out of the way, causing Anne Maria to crash onto the ground and stop bouncing.

Confessional

Anne Maria: Sure I wanna win a million dollars, but not at the expense of my looks! I mean, check me out! (Points to her head) Perfect hair, perfect tan, all this is worth a billion, easy!

Mike: (wincing) Okay, I know that was definitely painful. (Rubs hand on the back of his head nervously) I've ...uh...gotten hit on the head a lot over the years. So...yeah, I know that definitely hurt.

Jason: (holding his sides as he laughs) O-Okay...O-Okay...I know we have a challenge to win and all, but that was some (*beep*)ing hilarious (*beep*)! (Laughs even harder).

The camera pans to the Rats' totem, showing the still climbing Lightning as he nearly makes it to the top of the tree. Then pans down to show the rest of the team, minus B listening to Staci's tall tales. As Staci continued to ramble on, B walked past them while carrying a large log.

Staci: And my great great great aunt Dora actually taught Native Canadians to carve totems.

B grabs Staci by the arm and leads her away from her team, causing the rest of the team except Carly to sigh heavily with relief.

Sam: (nudges Carly) Hey Carly, wanna trade ears for a while?

Both Sam and Carly chuckle together at Sam's offer. Unbeknownst to the rest of the team, Luke is watching his twin sister over on the other team. Luna looked very nervous and stressed. She was also scratching her arms frequently, causing pink scratch marks to appear on her arms. Luke looks down and notices that he has been scratching himself as well.

Luke: (continues scratching himself) Aw crap! I knew this would happen!

Over at the Maggots, some of Luna's teammates start to take notice of her scratching.

Zoey: (cringing) Whoa! Are you okay?

Luna: (smiles meekly) Oh...uh...I'm fine...just...s-scratching...mosquito bites...?

Confessional

Luna: (still scratching her arms) Okay...I guess I should explain myself about this. I haven't been entirely truthful with everyone; I'm not as outgoing or confident as I seem to be. The truth is that I am actually really shy and I can get anxious or stressed around new people. And whenever I get anxious, I start to scratch myself uncontrollably even if my body doesn't itch. Don't ask me why, it's just a bad habit I picked up when I was little. Don't ask me how, I literally have no idea. Maybe my mind is telling my body to scratch away my anxieties? I don't know. The reason I was so relaxed and normal earlier was because I had Luke next to me. We both get anxious when we're apart, but mine is more severe. When we were little, I always felt like an outsider towards other girls because I always acted so much different than them. I was always a flow blown tomboy and I was never able to fit in well with the other girls. Apparently little girls don't find snakes, amphibians, lizards, or bugs as interesting as I did back then. When young girls like me realize this, they would try to become more girly even if it killed them. But I knew that I could never do that. While I did enjoy some girly activities at that age, I still maintained all of tomboyish traits. The only person I knew who would always accept me and have my back is Luke. I was beyond lucky to have a brother like him by my side. I've never felt insecure about what people thought about me when he's around me because I knew that I would always have at least one person around me who knew the real me and loved me just the way I was. However, if Luke isn't by my side and I'm surrounded by people I barely know, that's when I tend to get anxious. (Sighs heavily) I'm sure I'll become more calm once I get used to everyone on my team, but it may take a while...

Luke: (still scratching his arms) Okay, I should probably explain why I'm scratching myself obsessively like this. You see, Luna and I have a very strong connection to each other. We have what people would refer to as "twin telepathy". To put it simply, our twin telepathy basically lets Luna and I to sense and share each other's feelings. For example, Luna is scratching her arms right now because she is anxious, don't ask me why she does it, it's just a bad habit we picked up years ago when we were little. Anyway, when Luna gets anxious, I get anxious as well. And well, that pretty much sums it up as to why I have been scratching myself like this.

Back at the Rats team, B was leading Staci over to one end of the log teeter totter B had constructed using a log and a big rock to keep the log balanced.

Staci: Oh okay, you want me on this thing? (Steps onto the log teeter totter)

The camera pans to underneath the tree where B is leading Sam towards.

Sam: Whoa! Hey! You want me to stand here?

B then runs towards the other end of the log teeter totter and jumps hard onto it, causing Staci to be launched towards Sam, landing perfectly balanced on top of his shoulders. Everyone let out collective gasps of amazement and compliments while Lightning plummeted down onto the ground from the tree with the hacksaw still in his hand, once again failing to reach the top. Lightning groaned in pain as he recovers from the fall.

Confessional

Lightning: First of all, tree climbing is not a recognized sport. Plus, that tree was covered in butter or something! But if Chris is trying to make Lightning look bad, he can think again! Lightning never gives up and never surrenders! (Strikes a pose) SHA-LIGHTNING!

Mizuki: Crap! The Rats were getting ahead of us! Even with our advantage, we were still sucking! (Sighs heavily) On one hand, I could've just chopped the tree down myself, but on the other hand, that would draw attention towards me when it's time to start picking off the competition. Once the others see what I can do, they'll probably gang up on me and vote me off since I would be too big of a threat to deal with later. I want to show my team that I am an asset, not a threat...at least until the merge. So I can't show off all of my skills at once, I have to wait for the right time and place. Also, if I cut down the tree, Jordan would've given me the evil eye and a four hour long lecture on why it is wrong to cut down trees so carelessly. (Sighs dreamingly) I love my animal loving, tree hugging hunk...

The camera pans to Brick, who is now standing on a rock and looking ready to jump.

Brick: TIME TO WIN THIS! (Jumps down onto the trampoline and is launched towards the totem pole. He grabs the axe that is wedged into the end of the totem pole. He then starts panicking, flailing, and screaming for help when he realized how high he was).

Everyone on the team looked at him with disapproval, especially Jo and Jason.

Jo: Good grief!

Anne Maria: Geesh, what a baby!

Jason: (shaking his head with disbelief) You have got to be (*beep*)ing kidding me!

Chris: (over loudspeaker) Hey Jason, cool it with the swears dude! The list of content we're going to have to bleep out and censor is getting long, bro!

Jason: (Holds up two middle fingers) I don't (*beep*)ing think so, McLean! This is reality (*beep*)ing TV, I'll say whatever (*beep*) I feel like saying! You can go (*beep*) yourself, McLean you (*beep*)(*beep*)er!

Everyone was staring at Jason with a mix of amazement at Jason telling off Chris and shock at the swear words Jason had just spoken. Even the other team couldn't help but stop what they were doing to watch Jason cuss at Chris. The only thing that brought back their attention was Brick's continuous panicking and screaming.

Mike: Aw man! This isn't working!

Mike's eyes bulge as he suddenly gasps. He then hunches over with his eyes squinted.

Mike?: (in a sharp withered tone of voice) Gah durn it! Cut the danged rope already!

Anne Maria: That's what we're trying to do, Mike!

Mike?: Mike? Name's Chester, missy!

Zoey: (confused) Uh, excuse me?

Mizuki: (confused) Yeah, I second that. What the heck Mike?

Chester: You got a hearing problem or something, missy?! You kids today never listen! I told ya my name's Chester, not Mike, you ditzy Cracker Jap!

Mizuki's eyes widened before she lunges herself towards Chester. Unfortunately, she was held back by Anne Maria and Zoey, who both struggled to keep Mizuki from strangling Chester.

Mizuki: (enraged). WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?! Ohhhhh just wait till I get my hands on you, old man!

Chester: Don't you wave your fists at me, Cracker Jap! Didn't your parents teach you to respect your elders?

Confessional

Zoey: Mike is soooo sweet! Y'know I really don't get his old man comedy routine, but I bet it's really funny if you're from like, France or something?

Mizuki: (takes a deep breath) Okay, I'm calm now. Sorry you guys had to see that, but I'm not a fan of racial slurs, stereotypes, or Asian themed nicknames. It took all I had to keep myself from pulling out Chris's hair when he called me "Chopsticks". (clenches her fist) Man, I hope he doesn't keep calling me that. Otherwise, it's going to be a very long season for me to keep my cool. As for Mike, that old man impression he did out of the blue was quite unusual. I feel like I've read something about this before. (Taps chin curiously) Also, I cant shake the feeling that I might know Mike from somewhere before, but I have absolutely no idea where. I'd like to think that this is the first time I've met him, but something about him seems so familiar. (Shrugs) Oh well, it'll come to me eventually!

The camera pans back over to Team Rats, where Lightning had just been launched onto Scott's shoulders.

Lightning: (cheering) Lightning strikes!

From offscreen, the sound of Luke's screaming can be heard as he is launched on top of Lightning. Luke looks down and turns white as a sheet when he sees how high up he is.

Luke: (panicking) Ahhhh! Too high! Too high! Why the heck did I look down?!

Luke begins hyperventilating. Scott rolls his eyes.

Scott: Quit being such a wimp and keep still!

Lightning: Sha-yeah dude! There's nothing to be afraid of...well, except for the long fall down...

Luke: (still panicking) Not helping!

Lightning: But we got your back, bro! We ain't gonna let you fall! And if you do end up falling, one of us will catch you.

At that moment, Carly landed on top of Luke's shoulders, causing Luke to become even more stressed about the increasing chances of him falling.

Lightning: Yo deaf girl! You ain't afraid of heights, are you?

Carly: (shakes her head) No, wh-...(notices the panicking Luke under her) Oh, that's why. (places a hand on Luke's shoulder) Don't worry, Luke, you can do this! If not for yourself, at least do it for the team! Remember, there's no "I" in team!

Lightning: (surprised) There isn't? I've been spelling that word wrong for years...

Luke: (still panicking) There may be no "I" in team, but there is one in falling, ...and pain, ...and plummeting, and ...injury, ...and-...

Scott: (annoyed) Okay we get it! You can spell!

Luke: (still panicking) Why am I up this high anyway?! Why couldn't I have been down further towards the ground?!

Scott: Seriously? Ya rather be down there?

The camera pans down to show Sam, Staci, and Jordan. Staci was rambling, San looked annoyed, and Jordan looked like he was about to lose his mind. He kept forcing his smile as he listened to every word that Staci speaks.

Staci: And my great great great great uncle Peeta invented balance! Yeah before him-...

The camera quickly pans back up before Staci could finish.

Luke: (still panicking) Honestly, I'll take listening to Staci over heights any day!

The camera pans back to Brick, who is still trying to pull the axe out of the totem. Suddenly, Brick heard squeaking and notices the mutated hairless squirrel on the tree branch next to him.

Brick: (gasps) G-Go away! (Swats hand at the mutant squirrel) Hey, shoo! Shoo!

The mutated squirrel growls loudly at Brick, causing him to scream in terror. The camera pans back down to Zoey, Anne Maria, and Chester.

Chester: (tosses a rock up and down in his hand) Back in my day, we didn't need fancy saws and axes to cuts ropes! We did just fine with stone! (Throws the rock)

The rock Chester threw hits the mutated squirrel in the face, causing the mutant squirrel to become angrier. It's eyes glowed red as it begins to fire lasers at the contestants, causing them to run and scream for their lives as they dodge the lasers. Back over on the Toxic Rats' side, B launches Dawn, who lands perfectly on top of Carly, while standing on one foot. Carly could've sworn she heard the sound of a little twinkle as Dawn landed on her shoulders.

Sam: One more person'll do it! Dakota?

B and Sam look around for Dakota. The camera then pans to Dakota, who is lounging on a tree stump as her paparazzi takes pictures of her. Just then, Chris saws down a thick tree that tilts over onto the ground between Dakota and the paparazzi.

Chris: Timber! No time for photo ops, Dakota!

Dakota: (cringing back) Take it easy!

Confessional

Carly: Okay, I know I said that I'm the type of person who can get along with anyone, but Dakota's constant photo ops and lack of attention towards the challenge are starting to make me doubt if I can work with her. I've been dreading the elimination ceremony we may have to face in the future because I really don't want to have to vote off my teammates. Teamwork is about teams working with each other, not against each other. But if it comes down to it, I think I have a pretty good idea on who to vote for...

The camera pans back to the Mutant Maggots, who are still running and screaming as they dodge the lasers being shot at them by the mutant squirrel Chester peeved off. The squirrel then starts firing it's lasers at Brick as Brick dodges each laser.

Brick: (dodges lasers) Ah! Not the crew cut!

Eventually while dodging the lasers, Brick accidentally lets go of the axe and plummets down to the ground, moaning in pain. Mizuki notices this and rolls her eyes.

Mizuki: Okay! That's it! I'm done fooling around!

Mizuki proceeds to pick up a large branch and throws it at the mutant squirrel, causing it to fall out of the tree and stopping it from firing anymore lasers from it's eyes. As everyone stops running around, they watch as Mizuki walks up to the tree. She steadies her hand with a few practice swipes in the air first.

Mizuki: (raises her hand to strike) HEEEEYYYAAAHHHH!

Mizuki strikes the tree hard with a single chop. In less than a second, the tree falls backwards, taking the totem down with it. As the rest of her teammates stare at her with amazement, Mizuki picks up the axe and cuts the rope, separating the totem and the tree. The other team also watched Mizuki cut down the tree in a single chop and were as equally impressed as her team was.

Sam: (in amazement) Whoooaaaaaa...Awesome!

Jordan: (stares at Mizuki dreamingly) I know, isn't she?

Staci: Your girlfriend knows karate? That's totally awesome! Y'know, karate was actually invented by my great great great great great great great (with every "great" the sound of Staci's ramblings fades out as Jordan's nervous smile returns and his eye begins to twitch again).

Confessional

Mizuki: (blows on her fist) That's not even the strongest thing I can cut through. (Shows her hands to the camera) These hands can cut through steel! All of those years of hard training and discipline with Oba-Chan are paying off. (Blows a kiss to the camera and waves) Watashi wa, anata o aishiteimasu, Oba-Chan!

(Translation: I love you, Grandmother!)

Jo: (shocked) Chopsticks has got some impressive skills! Might not be a bad idea to make nice with her. But only until the right opportunity comes along and she's outlived her usefulness, then I'll break her as easily as a pair of chopsticks!

Brick: Quite a strong team member, that Mizuki! She'll definitely be a strong asset towards our team. (salutes) I'd go to war with her any day!

Zoey: Mizuki seems like a very nice girl, but whoa! She's terrifying strong! I really would like to be friends with her, but I just hope she doesn't crush me to death in the process.

Chester: Where in the Sam Hill am I? Those darned kids called this thing a confessional! So where's the freaking priest?! And why is their a toilet in here and one of those new fangled video cameras things pointing towards me?! Danged whippersnappers! What's a man gotta do to get some privacy out here?!

Over by the Toxic Rats, B is carrying Dakota over to the teeter totter, much to her dismay.

Dakota: Put me down! Take it easy!

The camera pans to Dawn, who looks at the timer with much concern.

Dawn: Only three minutes left!

Offscreen, Dakota's scream can be heard as she is launched on top of Dawn's shoulders.

Dawn: (hands Dakota the hacksaw) Saw the ropes!

Dakota takes the hacksaw and starts sawing the ropes, but she held the saw the wrong way so her efforts were ineffective.

Dakota: (trying to saw the ropes) How are you suppose to...it won't work!

Her team looked at her with disbelief.

Sam: Teeth down on the rope! Down!

Lightning: No girl, you cannot be that dumb!

Luke: (fighting the urge to scratch himself) For the love of all that is good, hurry up!

Dawn: Pretend it's daddy's steak knife!

Dakota: Oh! (Flips the hacksaw the right direction and chuckles sheepishly. Dakota starts to saw the ropes again, this time actually making progress. In less than a few seconds, the ropes are sawed in half, letting the totem fall towards the ground) There!

The totem falls to the ground with a thud, causing the other contestants to jump a few feet of the ground for a moment.

Sam: (coughs for a moment) B, change your name to A+!

Confessional

B: (blows on his fist and rubs it against his shirt, while smiling triumphantly.

Scott: (tossing a rock back and forth against the confessional wall) B thinks he's so smart, but once my plan goes into action, he won't know what HIT HIM! (Tosses the against the confessional wall, but it ends up hitting him in the eye) OW!

Dawn: B's plan was a stroke of genius! Though it did add to the amount of mental stress that Luke and Jordan are under, the plan was still brilliant nonetheless. (Gives a concerned look) Speaking of Jordan and Luke, I am increasingly worried about their well-being. Luke and Luna are falling apart without each other for support. I sensed in their auras the growing anxieties that they are feeling from being separated. They both feel safe and secure when they are in each other's presence, but become tense and insecure when separated. If something is not done immediately, their suffering will only worsen. (Sighs heavily) Such a tragedy to watch such a strong bond between siblings destroy them on the inside and the outside. As for Jordan, I sense that he is on the verge of a breakdown if he continues to listen to Staci's lies and tall tales. If only he knew the reason for Staci's fabrications...

Staci: I'm so glad to be on a team with such amazing people! I just know that our team will every challenge with such amazing people like Lightning, B, Carly, Luke, Dawn, and Jordan! As for Dakota, Scott, and Sam...well, I'm sure they have some kind of talent that I'll be able to see in future challenges. Oh, by the way talents were invented by my great great great great great great great grandmother Portia! Yeah, before her people didn't really have anything special about them and were kinda boring. Oh! And also, I asked Jordan while we were waiting if he wanted to be in a alliance with me and he said yes! He seemed so happy to be in a alliance with me that he kinda looked like he was trying not to cry tears of joy! I think our alliance is the first alliance of the season! But what would you expect since alliances were invented by my great great great great great...

Jordan: (holding his sides and laughing rather crazily) W-Why...Why...d-did...I...say...yes?! (Laughs harder and crazier) WHY?!

The camera pans to the river where the Maggots are cheering as they ride down the river on their totem. Following the Maggots were the Rats, who were also cheering as they rode down the river on their totem.

Jo: (looking back at the Rats) They're gaining on us!

Brick: Its my duty to inform you ma'am that we have bigger problems.

Brick points towards the waterfall ahead. Everyone gasped in fear while Luna and Cameron looked excited.

Cameron: (excited) My first waterfall!

Chester: And maybe our last!

Luna: (excited) Maybe for you Grandpa, but this sure as heck won't be mine! Woo!

Everyone stared at Luna's bursting enthusiasm. Luna quickly stopped looking so excited and started scratching her arm nervously.

Luna: (nervous) Uh...I mean...oh no?

The totem goes down the waterfall. Causing everyone to scream with fear, except Luna who took advantage of the screaming to cheer loudly as they went down the waterfall. As the totem descends down, it becomes airborne and strikes a hill before it leaps back into the air, causing Zoey to fall off the totem, but not before grabbing the end of the totem.

Chester: Ah, kids today and their crazy log rides...

Zoey: (screaming) MIKE!

Chester gasps and reverts back to Mike.

Mike: (notices Zoey's in danger) Zoey! (Grabs Zoey's hand) Zoey! Hang on tight!

Mike pulls Zoey back up onto the log, with the latter hugging him tightly.

Zoey: Okay, thanks Mike!

Mike: (smiles nervously) Uh-huh...No problem...

Confessional

Mizuki: Awwwwww! Mike and Zoey are soooooo cute together! They're definitely going to be a couple before this season is over! If they do or should I say when they do, I should totally ask them if they'd want to double date with me and Jordan! That would be awesome! (Suddenly, the sound of the Night Owl ringtone is heard, prompting Mizuki to take her phone out of her pocket and look at it). Huh, what do ya know? "ImthenumberoneTotalDramaSuperfan" just started shipping Mike and Zoey. And the episode is not even over yet! She works fast! (Scrolls down her phone and frowns) What the-...someone is shipping Staci and Jordan?! Apparently they haven't been watching the episode closely enough! Have you guys seen Jordan when he's around Staci, he looks like he'll explode the next time Staci says anything!

Mike: (sighing dreamingly) Zoey hugged me! Honestly, I didn't really know what was going on, but Zoey was hugging me so I didn't care! (Continues staring off until his eyes widened in realization at what he said earlier) Uh, can we edit out the part where I said that I didn't know what was going on...not that it really means anything! (Chuckles nervously)

The camera pans to the Toxic Rats, whose totem was now going down the waterfall as well. The totem crashed onto the ground and started going downhill just as the Maggots' totem did before them. While everyone cheered as they rode downhill, B motioned the team to lean forward.

Dawn: B wants us to lean forward!

The rest of the team obliged and started to lean forward as they were instructed to do so.

Staci: Yeah, my great great great great second aunt Mary invented log riding and she-...

Everyone except Jordan and Carly: We don't care!

The Rats pass the Maggots' totem.

Jo: Hey! How did they get in front of us?!

The camera pans to the campgrounds where Chris and Chef sit in lounge chairs as they wait for the contestants.

Chris: Ahhh...Feels good to be back!

A panting sound is heard, and getting closer. Owen enters the campground and stops, leaning heavily on his knees.

Owen: (still panting) Hey Chris! Get this: the boat wouldn't stop!

Chris: Oh look! It's former player Owen who's NOT competing this year!

Owen: (chuckles) Heheh, yeah! So I swam back to tell y-...WHAT?! NOT COMPETING?!

Chris: I'm afraid you and the other "classic" players have outlived your usefulness. (turns to the opposite direction) Chef?

Chef runs over to Owen and places a bomb on his face before running away. Owen sees the bomb and starts running away screaming. Chris pulls out his remote and presses the button to detonate the bomb, causing Owen to blast off into the sky, still screaming.

Chris and Chef at laugh at Owen's misfortune until they heard the screams from Team Rats as they slide down into the campgrounds fast on their totem.

Lightning: (cheering) Woo-hoo! First place! Go Team Lightning!

Confessional

Carly: Okay, maybe I didn't hear it correctly, but I could've sworn I heard someone who sounded a lot like Owen from the original cast screaming. Also FYI, the whole "Team Lightning" name is never gonna happen! Sorry Lightning.

Chris: (points to his watch) Tick Tock!

The camera shows the timer on the totem pole, which had less than twelve seconds left on the clock.

Scott: Quick! Grab the good cabin!

Without wasting anymore time, every member of the Toxic Rats lifted the totem pole and hurried over to the stump standing where the luxury cabin is. With one second to spare, they placed the totem on the stump and the timer stopped ticking. The Rats cheered, celebrating their victory. However their celebration was short lived when they heard the screams of the other team as they all fell off of their totem as it went flying and crashed into the luxury cabin. Before anyone could do anything, the timer count down to 3...2...and then 1, blowing up the cabin and destroying it completely, leaving nothing but chard marks in the grass and little bits of rubble.

Chris: Too bad... It had an eight-person hot tub and air conditioning!

The Toxic Rats groan at their loss.

Sam: (falls to his knees and screams to the heavens) WWWHHHHHYYYYYYY?!

Staci: Yeah, my great great great uncle James invented log cabins! Before him people had to sleep in the trees and they kept falling off all the time! (As Staci continues to ramble on, the camera pans slowly across the rest of her teammates as they glare at her with annoyed expressions on their faces) And my great great great aunt Phillis invented roofs, and before her houses were just walls and furniture! And every time it rained you had to get a new sofa! And my great great great gre-...

Staci was cut off by the sound of a loud scream from an unknown source. The camera pans quickly to reveal that Jordan was the one who had screamed.

Jordan: (holding his head) I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! STACI FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP ALREADY?! (pants heavily)

Everyone stared at Jordan, looking very surprised by his outburst. However, none was more surprised then Staci, who stood there speechless for once.

Staci: (stutters) B-But...I...I...Jordan, w-what are you trying to say to me?

Jordan: I'm saying exactly what someone should have told you a long time ago! I'm telling you to put zip it! I can't take smiling like an idiot and listening to every single lie that exits through that bigmouth of yours! That's right, I said lies! L-I-E-S...Lies! I don't believe any of those stories you've been telling me nonstop since we were running for our lives in the forest! And I'm not the only one who thinks this! Everyone here is sick of your nonstop tall tales about your imaginary relatives and none of us believes that any of your tall tales are true! In fact, the only thing about you that everyone does believe in is that your the most annoying person on this entire island, maybe even on the planet!

Staci: (looks around at the others dishearteningly) Is this true, guys? All of you (her eyes begin to water) think I'm annoying?

Most of the contestants looked down or away awkwardly and didn't say anything. Others however, did speak up.

Scott: (sighs heavily) Finally! Someone finally says something!

Dawn: (looking down and twiddles her fingers) I'm very sorry, Staci.

Lightning: Girl, my coach yaps at me less than you!

Staci: (turns to Carly) Even you, Carly?

Carly did not respond. In fact, she wasn't even paying attention. She was staring at the pile of chards and rubble that used to be their cabin.

Staci: (speaking a little louder) Carly?!

Still no response. B then taps on Carly's shoulder to get her attention and points towards Staci. Carly turns around and reaches for her hearing aid, turning up the volume.

Carly: Sorry guys, I wasn't paying attention. What are we talking about?

Staci: (looks skeptically at Carly) Wait a minute, have you been turning off your hearing aid every time I talk? Is it because even you think I'm annoying like everyone else does?

Carly: (lowers her head in shame and sighs heavily) No comment...I'm so sorry Staci, but if it makes you feel any better, I have been reading your lips so it wasn't like I was ignoring you.

Staci: (eyes water even more and a few tears trickle down her face) *sniffle* Well, I-I sor-ry that I-I'm such a bother to all of y-you...(voice cracks) I-I...You won't h-have to put up with me anymore!

Staci runs away from everybody, who all look awkward and guilty about making her cry. However, none of them looked or even felt more guilty about the whole situation than Jordan.

Confessional

Jordan: (sighs heavily) I really screwed up...

I didn't mean to be so harsh with Staci, but I just couldn't stand her nonstop lying anymore! Still though, I probably could've handled that situation better. I need to find her quickly and apologize.

Chris: Okay...on that super awkward note, as the only team with a cabin still standing, the Mutant Maggots win the first challenge!

The winning team's cheers of celebration are subdued, as they're disoriented from the rough landing they had. Nevertheless, they were thrilled about their victory.

Dakota: Hey wait a second! We got here first! (points at the Maggots) They got here last! We should be the ones who win and they should be the ones who lost!

Chris: True, but since you no longer have a cabin, technically it's like you've never arrived here in the first place.

Dakota: (crosses her arms) This is so not fair!

Chris: Maybe, but I'm still the host of this show! Rats lose, Maggots win! Deal with it!

The Rats groan at their loss.

Lightning: (walks up to Chris) So where am I going to sleep?

Chris: No worries! We got a backup cabin for you. It's every bit as nice as the one you lost!

The sound of whirling helicopter blades can be heard from above. The contestants look up to see a helicopter with a cabin dangling beneath it flying above the spot where the luxury cabin used to stand. The helicopter then carefully drops the cabin onto the rubble. The cabin was just as cruddy looking as the Maggots' cabin if not the same. The Rats groan at the sight of their cabin.

Lightning: Crap!

Chris: Rats, I'll see you at the campfire for our first elimination ceremony of the season...

Chris begins to trail off when he notices that Luna and Luke scratching themselves.

Chris: (unnerved) Uh...okay, why are you two scratching yourselves so much?

Luna: (scratching her arms) It's a long story.

Luke: (scratching his arms) Short version: we both scratch ourselves when we're anxious.

Luna (still scratching) Don't ask why, it's a bad habit.

Dawn: They have both been under a lot of stress since you've separated them, Chris! They must be together otherwise they will only get worse! Please, you must allow Luna to be on our team!

Carly: (raises her hand) I'll switch with Luna if that's okay.

Chris: (raises his hands in defeat) Alright, fine! Luna, you're on the Toxic Rats now! Carly, go join the Mutant Maggots!

Luna and Luke: (cheering) YES! AWESOME!

Luna ran over to Luke and hugged him, while Carly just smiled and shrugged as she walked over to the Maggots.

Chris: Okay now that we've got that settled, everyone should start unpacking! Though the Rats might want to hold off on unpacking for a while since I'll be seeing them tonight at the elimination ceremony! (Chuckles and gives Chef a high five).

Confessional

Luna: (squeals with joy) Eeeeeee! Thank you soooo much Chris for letting Luke and I be on the same team! You're my new favorite celebrity and I take back every horrible thing I've ever said about you on that Chris McLean hate blog someone wrote to rant about you! Which reminds me (Pulls out phone from her back pocket) better delete my account...

Luke: (cheering) WOO-HOO! Finally back together with my twin sister! Every second we were apart was torture for the both of us! You rock, Chris!

Mizuki: I'm glad the twins are back together, but I do wish that Jordan had spoken up before Carly did so we could both be on the same team together. But I guess he was too deep into his own guilty conscience to take notice of the situation. I really hope he patches things up with Staci. Jordan has always been so nice to people and he hardly ever shows his anger towards others. What he did to Staci was pretty brutal though, I wonder if he even can patch things up with her?

Jordan: So I was so lost in thought over what I did to Staci that I missed an opportunity to be on the same team with Mizuki. (sighs heavily) Unfortunately, that's the least of my concerns. I have to find Staci fast and hope she will accept my apology. I didn't want to snap at her like that, but I did. The best thing I can do about it now is try to bury the hatchet with her.

Jo: Luna and Carly switching teams isn't really that much of a loss in my opinion. But if the deaf girl gets in my way, she'll be out of here faster than I can run!

Carly: Offering to take Luna's place on the Maggots was the right thing to do. Did you see how happy they were when they were reunited together? I'd give up a BILLION bucks if everyone on Earth could be as happy as they were all the time. But I guess I'll just have to settle for now. I feel a little bad for abandoning my team, but as long as it made someone happy, I'm satisfied.

Mutant Maggots Boys' Cabin

Mike, Cameron, Jason, and Brick enters the cabin carrying their luggage.

Jason: Nice cabin, huh?

Cameron: (confused) Was that sarcasm?

Jason: (shakes his head) Nah, I'm serious, shrimp. You should see the apartment I live in, this is a major upgrade!

Mike: No offense, but that's kinda sad...

Jason: (shrugs) Eh, none taken. I live in in a crap hole! Why do you think I'm even on this show?

Cameron: The exact same reason all of us are on this show: to win the million dollars.

Jason: Exactly. Now, how do you guys want to bunk? I honestly don't give a crap where I sleep as long as I get a bed.

Brick: I shall take the top bunk on the right if that is acceptable.

Mike: Go nuts Brick, I'll take the bottom bunk.

As Brick and Mike set their stuff on their bunks, Cameron and Jason looked at each other.

Jason: Guess you and I are bunking together, string bean. You going to go top or bottom?

Cameron: (walks over to the left bunk) I'll take the bottom bunk (places stuff on the lower bunk bed) You can have the top if you want.

Jason: (shrugs and climbs onto the top bunk) Whatever pipsqueak, like I said, I don't really care.

Brick: (pulls out an alarm clock with trumpets attached on top parallel to each other) Hey, you guys won't mind if I set an alarm, would you?

The other three boys nodded their heads in agreement.

Jason: Knock yourself out, army dude! I sleep through police sirens and gunshots, I can sleep through an alarm clock.

Cameron: (cringing) Wow, you're neighborhood sounds very dangerous!

Jason: (scoffs) Little man, you have no idea! It's like a war zone where I live! I bet you could relate, eh Brick?

Brick: (salutes) Affirmative! Military school can be quite the battlefield!

Jason: Speaking of which, are you a military cadet by choice or are your parents trying to punish you?

Brick: That is a negative! Military school was my decision! I am currently in training to one day serve in the military as a fully fledged military soldier! Just like every member on my dad's side of the family did before him!

Jason: My Dad once dressed up as a veteran to get free stuff at the casino...

Brick: (furiously springs up from his bunk) Stolen valor?! How dishonorable! And a great show of disrespect towards our troops!

Jason: (shrugs) Hey, I didn't say I approved of what he did! In fact there's a lot of stuff that he's done that I don't approve of...like that time he got drunk and drove his car through that military graveyard...

Brick: (furious) What a disgraceful man your father is! To do something as heinous as desecrate the resting place of our fallen troops...

Jason immediately jumped down from his bunk and grabbed Brick angrily by the shirt.

Jason: (furiously) WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY, CREWCUT?! I know you didn't just say that about my dad!

Cameron: (nervously) C-C'mon guys, l-let's just calm dow-...

Jason shot an angry glare at Cameron, causing him to shrink back in fear.

Jason: (furiously) Now you listen to me, Private (*beep*)er! My dad may be a drunk irresponsible reckless crack snorting (*beep*)hole, but I'm the only one who gets to call him out on his crap! And anyone else who thinks they have the right to do so will get a knife stuffed so far up their (*beep*) that they can taste it! (Looks around) Everyone clear on this?!

All three of them nodded their heads. Jason lets go of Brick's shirt and climbs back up to his bunk. Everyone stands still in silence for a while after that scene, looking quite terrified and nervous.

Mike: (whispers to Cameron) I wonder if the girls are getting along any better...

Mutant Maggots Girls' Cabin

Jo, Zoey, Anne Maria, Carly, and Mizuki enter their cabin, carrying their luggage. Jo speeds right past them and throws her things onto the top bunk on the left side of the cabin.

Jo: Top bunk! Called it!

Anne Maria: (angrily) Hey blondie! I wanted the top bunk!

Mizuki: (walks past Anne Maria, rolling her eyes) There's two more bunks, Anne Maria. Take your pick!

Anne Maria growls, and takes the second top bunk on the right side of the cabin. Zoey walks towards Jo's bunk, and places her stuff on the lower bunk.

Zoey: I think I'll bunk here, I mean...if that's okay with you?

Jo: (shrugs) Whatever...

Mizuki and Carly both walk over to the first bunk on the right side of the cabin.

Mizuki: We're not going to have to fight each other for the top bunk, are we?

Carly: (shakes her head) Actually, I would much rather prefer it if you took the top bunk and I take the bottom bunk. That way I can place my hearing aid on this stool and also have it close to me.

Mizuki: (starts climbing up the top bunk with her stuff) It's all yours, thanks!

Carly: (places her luggage on the lower bunk) No problem.

Anne Maria: (cheering) Aight! I gots two beds all to myself! Suckers!

Jo: (scoffs) Unless Chris decides to add another girl to our team just for the heck of it. So deaf girl, I got a question for you.

Carly: (looks up at Jo) Um...My name is Carly, and I'm all ears.

Jo: (smirks) Not from what I've heard. Speaking of which, can you really hear us with that hearing aid?

Carly: (nods) Yes I can. I'm also able to adjust the volume on my hearing aid so I can either hear sounds more clearly or less clearly. However, I'm not completely dependent on my hearing aid! I can read lips and I know sign language. As long as I pay attention to the people around me, I can understand what their saying despite not being able to hear them.

Zoey: That's actually pretty cool!

Carly: Thanks! I'm really hoping I win the million dollars so that I can donate a cut of it towards charities that helps young people with disabilities or special needs around the world.

Zoey: Aw! That's such a nice plan!

Jo: Too bad it won't be happening, because I'm going to be the one who wins the million!

Anne Maria: As if! I'm the one who's going to win this show!

Mizuki: Obviously, we all have the same goal here. I say we put that sort of fiery ambition towards our team!

Zoey: Mizuki is right! If we keep winning challenges like we did today, maybe everyone from our team will make it to the merge!

Anne Maria: In case you've forgotten already, Red, we only won on a technicality!

Jo: But we did still win!

Carly: Exactly! All of us just need to put in a little more effort and together we'll never lose!

Jo: (scowls) Some of us needs to put in more effort into the challenges than others...(*cough*)...Mizuki...

Mizuki: What do you mean? I'm the one who cut down the tree and the totem!

Jo: Right at the last second! If you had done that sooner, we would have been the first ones to arrive at the campgrounds! If you got skills, put them to good use and don't hold out on us!

Mizuki: Y'know, the last thing I need is to receive a lecture from you! It's bad enough I'm gonna have to hear one from Jordan about cutting down the tree! At least I did a heck of a better job at cutting down the totem than you did!

Jo: That's another thing, you're gonna have to keep your distance from that boyfriend of yours! He's our enemy now!

Mizuki: Jordan's my boyfriend! I'm not going to avoid him just because we're on opposite teams!

Jo: You can't date the competition! He'll take advantage of you and throw you off your game!

Anne Maria: Hate to say it girl, but blondie's got a point.

Jo: If you let your feelings for him get in the way of the game, I guarantee you that you'll be the next one to go home!

Zoey: C'mon girls, we shouldn't be fighting amongst ourselves like this! We're all on the same team so we have to work together!

Mizuki: (sighs heavily) You're right, Zoey. And so are you Jo, well sort of. We all have to work together as a team if all of us want to make it far into this game. And Jo, I know you're just keeping your eye on victory, but I'm not going to stay away from Jordan 24/7! I am willing to compromise by promising to keep my focus on the challenges and to not let my feelings for Jordan prevent us from winning, but I refuse to cut myself off from Jordan completely.

Carly: I'd say that's pretty fair, how about you guys?

Anne Maria: Whatever

Zoey: Of course!

Jo: (rolls her eyes) Fine...but get in my way and I'll make the rest of your time here on this island a living nightmare!

Not even a full second has passed when Mizuki fell over laughing, clutching onto the sides of her stomach as she laughs even harder.

Jo: (irritated) What's so funny?!

Mizuki tries to stop herself from laughing as she stands up. Her bursts of laughter fall silent after a few moments.

Mizuki: (snickers) Sorry Jo, but the way you tried to intimidate me was hilarious! Girlfriend, there are only two people on Earth who have ever intimidated me: my grandmother and my mother. Trust me, you're nothing compared to them!

Jo scowls at Mizuki, fighting the urge to jump down from the top bunk to punch her.

Zoey: How terrifying can a sweet old lady be?

Mizuki: (chuckling) Awww! You're so cute! You think Oba-Chan's a sweet harmless old woman!

Anne Maria: (confused) Oba-...what?

Mizuki: Oba-chan; it's Japanese for grandmother.

Anne Maria: Yeah, well we're not in Japan, girl! We're in Canada! Stick to English or go back to Japan!

Mizuki: (frowns) Actually, I live in Canada! I'm only half Japanese, the rest is Canadian!

Anne Maria: All the more reason to stick with English!

Mizuki's frown deepens further.

Toxic Rats Girls' Cabin

Dawn, Dakota, and Luna enter the girls cabin with their luggage.

Dakota: Three bunks, huh? I guess each of us gets two beds to themselves.

Luna: What about Staci?

Dakota: (walks over to the first bunk on the right side of the cabin) She'll just have to bunk with one of you two, but we get first choice on the bunks! Besides, there's a chance she might not even be here after tonight.

Dawn and Luna looked a bit uneasy.

Luna: Yeah...(looks down awkwardly) that reminds me, we all have to decide who we're going to vote off.

Dakota: (scoffs) Pfft...I already know who I'm voting for! It's bad enough I have to spend this season in a suck-tacular cabin! I'm not sharing a cabin with that chatterbox Staci for a single night!

Luna: (walks over to the second bunk on the right side of the cabin and places her stuff on the lower bunk) I'm not sure who to vote for since I just got on this team...

Dakota: You could join me in voting off Staci! All of us can vote together as a group, too! It'll be like an all girls alliance, temporarily of course! (Turns to Dawn) How about you, Dawn? Are you in?

Dawn looks down and twiddles her fingers, unsure of what to say.

Dawn: (nervously) Well...I haven't...um...exactly made my decision yet...

Dakota: Oh C'mon! Staci's gotta go! Even you are just about as annoyed with her as the rest of us!

Luna: Actually...I don't really know her that well...soooo...

Dakota: Then let me fill you in! She's a chatty Kathy who talks about made up relatives nonstop and never shuts up for too long. You wanna deal with that all season?!

Luna: True, but she just looked so upset when Jordan finally told her how everybody felt about her nonstop ramblings. It just wouldn't feel right to vote her off after what she just went through. I think we should give her a chance.

Dawn: Though I have yet to make my final decision, I also agree with Luna that we must not be rash with the decision to eliminate Staci. I'm willing to give her a chance, but whether or not she receives that chance is up to the rest of our team.

Dakota: (rolls her eyes and sits on her lower bunk) Both of you are crazy...

Luna: (scowls) Says the spoiled rich girl who won't go anywhere without her paparazzi entourage following her around all day! (takes a glance at Dakota, who just ignores Luna and starts texting on her cellphone) And...she's not even listening to me.

Toxic Rats Boys' Cabin

Lightning, Scott, Sam, B, and Luke enter the boys' cabin, carrying their luggage. They all looked around to get a thorough view on the crappy cabin they were going to be living in for the rest of the season.

Luke: Could be worse, I mean I'm surprised Chris isn't making us sleep in a cave or having us build our own treehouse shelter.

Scott: (walks over to the first bunk on the right side of the cabin) It's a lot nicer and cleaner than my bedroom back home.

Lightning: This sha-sucks! Lightning should not have to live like this! Lightning should be chillin in that sweet eight person hot tub instead of being stuck in this dump!

Sam: (walks over to the first bunk on the right side of the cabin and sits on the lower bunk) Yeah, this totally sucks man. (Pulls out his handheld game console and starts playing it).

Lightning: (walks over to the first bunk on the left side of the cabin) That said, Lightning's scoring the top bunk. (Backflips onto the top bunk) SHA-BOOM!

Luke: I'll admit that this isn't as nice as that luxurious cabin we could've won if the Maggots didn't blow it up, but like I said before, we could've had it much worse.

Sam: (still playing his game) Totally. At least this cabin has outlets that I can use to charge my games.

Lightning: (crosses arms) Guess you got a point, dude. But Lightning's still SHA-PEEVED that we lost!

Sam: (still playing his game) Hey, at least we only lost on a technicality. Honestly, we did pretty good out there. SWEET! Just scored another power up!

Luke: Sam's right guys! This challenge was just a warm up! Next time we'll show those Maggots what the Toxic Rats can really do! Those Maggots may have scored a goal, but the Toxic Rats will bring the final touchdown!

Lightning: (springs up from his bed) Ah Yeah! Lightning's digging yo fire! SHA-BAM!

Sam: (cheers) Awesome! I just unlocked a new weapon!

Luke: But before we can all level up, we have to decide who's getting the boot tonight. Thoughts?

Everyone else except B: Staci!

B nods his head in agreement with the rest of them.

Luke: (nods) My thoughts exactly! (Looks around the cabin) Hey, aren't we missing someone?

Sam: (not taking his eyes off his game) I'm pretty sure we're all here.

Scott: (looks around) Nah, now that you mention it Luke, we are missing someone. Where's Jordan?

Everyone shrugged their shoulders.

The sun was setting as Staci was sitting alone underneath the dock of shame, trying to pull herself together after being yelled at by Jordan. However, her efforts were futile as she could not stop thinking about everything that Jordan had said to her. The truth was more painful than she could imagine. Tears continued to stream down from her eyes until she suddenly hears footsteps from the dock. Seconds later, a head suddenly pops out from the end of the dock, looking at the teary eyed girl. The head that was staring at her upside down from the dock was Jordan's head.

Staci: (watery eyed) *sniffle* J-Jordan...?

Jordan: (climbs down from the dock and starts moving closer to Staci) There you are! You would not believe how many places I had to go to while trying to find you. I tried the beach, the confessional, the communal bathrooms, and ran around and through the forest several times before trying my luck here.

Staci: Y-you were looking for me? But I thought you didn't like me. After everything you said about me annoying you, I thought you hated me...*sniffle*

Jordan: But Staci, I don't hate you! Okay, I'll admit that yes I found your nonstop tall tales were annoying, but I wouldn't hate you for being annoying! I've got some friends back home who can be pretty annoying and yet I still hang out with them all the time. Heck, I have younger cousins that are really annoying but I still love them anyway! And about the things that I said to you, I didn't mean to say those things to you like that. What I did to you was completely harsh and so out of line. And...I'm so sorry for hurting you! I never wanted to do that to you and I don't know what came over me when I snapped at you like that. But what's done is done and I can't change the past, but I hope it's not too late to make things right with you now. I want us to be friends, though I probably don't deserve it after what I did...

Staci: (wipes away her tears) Thanks Jordan! I forgive you but all those things you said about me made me realize how true they were...(Looks down sadly) and the truth really hurts, but I suppose it must be said...

Jordan: If you don't mind me asking, what's up with those nonstop tall tales that you keep telling everyone? Obviously everyone knows they aren't true. I know for a fact that your great great uncle Jason didn't invent the letter E. Why do you keep telling lies and false stories to everyone?

Staci: (sighs and looks down at the water) Honestly, lying constantly about myself, my life, and my relatives all started as a way to make myself more appealing towards others, but now it's become a habit that I can't control. Probably because telling the truth about myself will make others uninterested in me, or at least that's what I've been thinking ever since I started middle school. When I was in elementary school, I wasn't worried about what others thought about me, and neither did everyone else. In elementary school, it's all about fun and games with friends without judgement about who's the most athletic, or the smartest, or the prettiest, in our class. But when middle school starts, everyone is beginning to establish their identity as they grow older and starts separating themselves off into cliques as practice for when they finally enter high school, where their status quo has already been established from their time in middle school. Back when I first entered middle school, I didn't really have much of an identity for myself. I wasn't the most athletic like the aspiring jocks, or the smartest like the aspiring nerds, or the prettiest like the aspiring popular girls, I was just a plain girl who was kinda boring. I suppose I thought that if I just made up stuff about myself, my life, and my relatives, people would find me interesting and be impressed by me. But I guess the lying went too far and eventually became a second nature to me. I'm not even sure if everyone I told my tall tales to even believed me or not. After what you told me though, I'm starting to think that nobody ever believed me and was just didn't call me out on my lies because they were trying to spare my feelings, just like everyone on this island did.

Jordan: (places a hand on Staci's shoulder) Staci, I understand why you felt the need to lie all the time, but what you need to understand is that you shouldn't have to lie about yourself so that people will like you. From what you told me, you wanted to fit in by telling others "interesting facts" about yourself so that you could be seen as just as interesting as everyone else around you. But even if people do believe you, they are not seeing you as interesting, rather they are seeing your lies and stories as interesting. If you want people to think that you are interesting, you have to be true to yourself instead of lying to others about who you are! Honestly, I'm not even sure who the real you is, but I would like to get to know her and become friends with her.

Staci: (smiles) You really mean that?

Jordan: (nods) Definitely! If you want people to like you, than you have got to be you! You don't have to worry about whether or not people will like the real you. Those who like you for you are the people who truly care about you. (Looks up at the orange sky) We still have some time left before the elimination ceremony. Until then, I just want to get to know my new friend Staci, the REAL Staci. Tell me all about yourself, I'm all ears!

Staci smiles and hugs Jordan, who returns the hug.

Confessional

Staci: (smiles big) I can't get over how nice and sweet Jordan has been to me! Well, except for when he snapped at me, but I forgave him for that. Besides, if I had never heard the truth from him, I probably would've never had made such a great real friend like Jordan. We talked underneath those docks for what felt like forever until Chris called our team down to the elimination ceremony. It felt good to finally show someone who I really am instead of having to make up stories all the time! Well, I did slip up a few times but Jordan told me to just take breaking my compulsive lying habit one step at a time. Turns out we have a lot in common! Y'know, if Jordan was single and a little more of my type, we might make a good couple. Yeah, but I just like Jordan as a friend. He's my type as a friend, but not really my type as a boyfriend. I really hope the Total Drama blog writers don't start shipping us as a couple, that would just be really awkward...

Jordan: I'm so glad I was able to patch things up with Staci and become friends with her. She said that she thought people wouldn't find her interesting, but she's actually pretty cool when she's not telling lies. During our entire conversation, I learned that we actually have a lot in common. We both like manga, anime, video games, and we have very similar taste in music. I also found out that most of the lies she told about her relatives were only "half-baked" lies. For example, her great grandfather Dave obviously didn't invent forks, but he was a cook at a restaurant. And her great great aunt Lois may not have invented plates, but she was the owner of a ceramics shop that sold plates. And lastly, her great great great uncle George shockingly didn't invent floors, but he was a carpenter. Her relatives may not have invented anything, but they still lead pretty interesting lives and career paths. Oh, and before I forget...(pulls out phone from his back pocket)...Mizuki texted me that someone has been trying to ship me and Staci, and this episode is not even over yet! I'm only going to ask you guys this once, please stop shipping Staci and I. We're just friends! I have an awesome girlfriend! We're never gonna happen! Got it? I hate to crush you guys' hopes, but I'm not going to let what I have with Mizuki be ruined by some love triangle shipping done by Total Drama bloggers online with nothing better to do.

Nighttime fell as the camera pans down to the Toxic Rats, sitting on ten individual stumps by the blazing campfire. Their faces are lit by the campfire, which revealed their solemn expressions. Chris stands at a podium on the other side of the flames, while holding a tray of marshmallows.

Chris: The votes are cast. Those who receive a regular marshmallow can stay. But this season, one player will receive a very special marshmallow. A marshmallow you do NOT want to eat.

Chef walks in, wearing a yellow hazmat suit and carrying a small chest with a biohazard symbol on the front. He flips the lid open, showing a radioactive marshmallow glowing an ominous green.

Luna: (raises a hand) Uh, you're not gonna make us eat it though, right?

Chris: Unfortunately. (Luna sighs with relief) Whoever receives the marshmallow of toxic loserdom is out of the contest. Which means, you can't come back. EVUR! The following players are safe:

Scott!

(Chris throws the marshmallow at Scott, who catches it with one hand)

B!

(B catches the marshmallow with both hands)

Lightning!

(Chris tosses the marshmallow to Lightning, who also catches it with one hand)

Dawn!

(Dawn catches the marshmallow with both hands)

Luke!

Luke: Awesome! (Luke pumps his fist in the air before he catches the marshmallow with his other hand)

Luna!

(Luna sighs with relief as she catches the marshmallow with both hands. Luke and Luna then bumped fists)

And Sam!

(Chris tosses the marshmallow at Sam, which bounces off his head and onto the handheld game he was playing)

Staci and Jordan both looked nervous as they noticed the last two marshmallows on the tray. Dakota however, was not even paying attention and was texting on her phone without a care.

Chris: Jordan, Staci, Dakota, all three of you are on the chopping block! Staci, you pretty much annoyed everyone on your team with your tall tales. (Staci rubs her arm nervously, with an embarrassed expression on her face). Dakota, you were more concerned with having your picture taken by your annoying little entourage than with helping your teammates with the challenge. (Dakota completely ignored Chris as she continued typing on her phone). And Jordan, quite the performance you put on when you finally told Staci to clam it.

Jordan looks down, still feeling a little guilty about what he said to Staci. He was pretty sure everyone was staring at him, even if he couldn't see their faces.

Staci: We're cool now! He apologized to me! And I don't blame him for what he said! He helped me realize that if I want people to like me, I have to be me instead of what I tell other people through my lies!

Jordan smiles at Staci for sticking up for him, who returned the smile back.

Chris: Well that's all sweet and touching, but this is a half hour show, so I'm gonna have to cut this touchy feely moment short. Also, I really don't care if you guys are on good terms or not. Any who, the next player safe from elimination tonight is:

Jordan and Staci held their breath as they waited for what seemed like forever for Chris to give one of them the next marshmallow. Meanwhile, Dakota was still texting on her phone, not taking any notice to the suspension.

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Chris: (tosses marshmallow) Surprisingly Jordan!

Jordan breaths out as he catches the marshmallow with both hands. He then fist pumps in triumph before he looks over at Staci and becomes nervous again.

Chris: And the marshmallow of toxic loserdom goes to...

Staci clasps her hands together and lifts them up, pleading, while Dakota continues to ignore everything that is going on around her by texting on her phone.

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Staci!

Staci: (sighs with disappointment) Aww, but I was doing so good...

Chef tosses the toxic marshmallow to Staci, who catches the marshmallow with both hands. Unfortunately, the radiation from the marshmallow caused all of Staci's hair to fall out. The other contestants gasped at this and backed far away from Staci, trying to keep the radioactive marshmallow from affecting them.

Staci: (stands up and sighs) I guess it's the Dock of Shame for me then.

Chris: Actually, we came up with something new this season! You'll looove it!

Confessional

Luke: Those are never good words to hear, at least when they come from Chris!

The camera pans to the docks, where Staci is now sitting in a towering catapult that sits at the end of the dock.

Chris: Say hello to the Hurl of Shame! Patent-pending.

Staci: (looks at her teammates) Goodbye everyone! I'm really sorry I couldn't be more helpful and for annoying you guys so much. And Jordan, thank you for being my fri-EEENNNNDDDDD!

Chris launches the catapult mid-sentence, Staci screams as she is launched to who knows where.

Chris: (turns towards the camera) One down, eighteen to go! Who's next in line? Find out next time, right here on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!

The scene fades to black...


End file.
